I got up from my chair and suggested we head to the backyard to swing. I pushed them in their swings for who knows how long. We sang songs at the top of our lungs. We laughed. We made up silly stories and laughed some more.
We kicked the soccer ball back and forth. We picked wildflowers. We wandered around our yard and the field behind us.
We headed back to the deck for some more fun at the water table.
I sat back down in my chair and took in the world. I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face. My kids were having the time of their lives. I was, too. This was the most serene I’d felt in a long time. There wasn’t a care in my world, no trouble on my mind. I admired the beauty around me and the sweetness of my children. Pure joy radiated from me.
I ran inside to grab some towels and saw that I had a message on my phone. As I listened to the message, my heart sank. I was supposed to have been at an appointment at 2:30 that day. It was nearly 4:00. Somehow, I’d lost track of an entire day.
How unlike me, I thought. Sure, I can be absent minded and do some silly things, but missing appointments is not one of them.
My husband realized there was something wrong, but he was on the phone. I mouthed to him that I’d missed my appointment and he gave me a nod of understanding, but went on with his phone call.
I called the office and explained what happened. They told me they understood and that they’d waive the “no show” fee. We rescheduled my appointment for this week.
The appointment wasn’t for anything serious. It wasn’t a big deal and it all worked out. Still, I felt terribly guilty. I was angry with myself for being so irresponsible. Normally, I have “to do” lists and spend my days wrought with worry about what I have to do and when I have to do it.
I went back outside to watch my kids, but I just couldn’t shake the disappointment in myself. When my husband finished his phone call, he came outside and sat down next to me. He chuckled a little and tapped his hand over mine.
“That’s not like you,” he reminded me.
I shook my head and said, “I know.” I put my head down in my lap and started to cry.
“Did you get it worked out?” He asked. I shook my head yes. “Are you enjoying this time with the kids?” I shook my head yes. “Then, don’t worry about it. There’s nothing to cry about. Keep on enjoying those kids over there.”
So I did. I forgot my worries. I let go of the guilt and disappointment. I headed straight for the water table and splashed along with my kids.
I know it’s not the most responsible thing in the world, but sometimes life happens when we miss appointments. It happens when we clear our schedules and our minds. It happens when we make time for what’s most important. For the first time in a long time, I wasn’t worried about anything. I was truly soaking up my beautiful, wonderful life.
I pray that you might snatch up some of those fleeting moments yourself! Is there something on your calendar today that can wait?
Copyright 2012 Leanne Willen