There are lots of people talking and writing about maintaining work life balance these days. They talk about trying to do it all and yet still give ample attention to every area of your life. Yeah, sure. No problem.
The idea of maintaining balance comes right out of the Bible. In 1 Peter 5:8 (AMP) it says:
“Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring (in fierce hunger), seeking someone to seize upon and devour. “
It’s pretty clear that making sure you don’t get out of balance is a key to living a happy life. But as a Christian Life Coach, I hear from Christian women who are pretty much the opposite. They are burned out, stressed out, and pulling their hair out.
I once coached a client who was completely miserable. She couldn’t understand why she felt so stressed all the time, even though she knew she was abundantly blessed. It wasn’t until we began digging into all the things she did each day, particularly the reasons why she was doing them.
She discovered that not only was she giving her time and attention to things that didn’t really matter, she was also doing for other people many things they should’ve been doing for themselves. Her misplaced sense of having to do it all, be it all, and carry it all had completely thrown her into a state of constant running, stressing, and worrying.
When she finally slowed down enough to look at where she was in her life and how she got there, she was able to start getting control by identifying the most important people and tasks that genuinely contribute to your life. She began allowing time only for those things that contribute to her goals of focus, balance, and peace.
So how do you go back and start over? How do you rewind until you come to a place where you were a whole lot happier and in control?
What are the conditions that have to be present in your life in order for you to feel balanced?
Here are some questions to ask :
- If I were to rate my life happiness on a scale of 1-10, with 10 as deliriously happy, what number would I give it?
- How long ago was I truly happy and how did my life look back then? What made my life work back then? What’s changed?
- What area of my life is the hardest for me right now? Is it my health? My work? My family life?
- What area would I most like to make changes?
- What is the biggest energy drainer in my life right now? If I could change just this part of my life, how would it look different?
If you’re like most Christian women, some of these questions are not only tough to answer, but the answers are a little scary. As you take the time to slow down, breathe, and take a good, long look at how you’re living your life, it may be time to make some changes.
But making life changes is never easy. It’s not so simple to just stop what you’re used to doing and go another direction. It’s like driving down the highway at a high speed and throwing the car into reverse. It just doesn’t end well.
So what are the easiest ways to make necessary changes?
First, describe exactly how you want your life to look. Put as much detail to your plan as possible. Break your life down into each area of the life wheel and describe how it would look if it were exactly as you would like it.
Second, make sure you consider all the areas of your life. Sometimes we decide to make life changes because we feel out of balance. But we only do it in one area without considering how all the areas of our lives are connected. Make sure each area of your life is in balance and that any changes you make flow smoothly through all of them.
Third, consider the other people in your life and how they factor into your new plan. It’s not always easy to arbitrarily make life changes when they affect other people. Discuss the changes with the affected people. Be specific and give dates. That way they aren’t taken by surprise.
Fourth, start thinking about small steps you can take to move toward the life you described above. You can’t expect things to be different unless you actively take steps to change. Even baby steps are good because you’re moving in the right direction. What can you do today? What changes can you make this week? This month?
Here is a free downloadable report that will help you in your journey to focus, and live a more balanced, and peaceful life.
As a Christian life coach, Karen Wolff specializes in helping Christian women, particularly entrepreneurs and other professional women find more hours in the day, less stress and ways to be happy and productive at work and still make it to their child’s soccer game! Her first website, www.christian-books-for-women.com helps Christian women connect their faith with everyday life. She offers lots of great books, practical articles, print & pray prayers, and a place to both offer prayer requests and pray for other Christian women.
Copyright 2013 Karen Wolff