This picture is of my 18-month-old, Lucy, looking up at the sky while playing in our yard. I have no idea what she’s looking at, but she does this a lot and she’s usually smiling (perhaps a bird, a tree, an airplane, an angel, a glimpse of heaven?). She loves to spin around and fall down too…little childhood thrills!
I have been looking up to the sky a lot too recently, but not for Lucy’s reasons (although she is starting to point to Jesus and Mary and say their names…which is ridiculously cute!).
Rather, I am looking up to the sky asking God if He really meant to trust me with this much. I consider everything (especially my husband and young children) tremendous blessings, but I find myself saying or at least subconsciously thinking, “God grant me the grace to endure my blessings!”
I ran into a beautiful, holy grandmother after Mass one Sunday recently: she’s a lactation consultant who runs a group for new mothers and I attended her inspiring classes with my first. She told me that her mother (mom to 16) had this saying posted in her kitchen. It just spoke to me so clearly! And, it made me feel so…not alone.
I was *trying* to make dinner one night this week (well, trying to get something edible with a little nutritional value on the table!), and it was not going well. I don’t really have to write what was going on as most mothers reading this can fill in the blanks (two preschoolers fighting, toddler melting and wanting to be held, 1st grader whining because I wouldn’t take her bike riding, and the kindergartener pouting because I told him it was not yet time for his “Mommy’s making dinner” TV show to start).
I have to remind myself constantly that they are small children who do not have an agenda to drive their mother crazy! They do not (and shouldn’t) appreciate that I am not trying to ignore them…but rather, to care for them (like meal preparation). Deep breaths! God grant me the grace to endure my blessings!
As all this was going on this week, I had to put the toddler down because I was feeling kind of “funny” (and unlike Lucy, I don’t like to spin around and fall down!). This quickly brought to mind my other issue…at 36 weeks pregnant, I am having issues with high blood pressure (this has never happened to me before…I’m usually pushing the double stroller around the park at 38 weeks!). I then remembered that, God willing, an infant would be added to this chaos in just a few short weeks. Deep breaths! God grant me the grace to endure my blessings!
Of course, the insanity of that moment passed. As I become a more experienced mother, I know how quickly everything passes…no need to fret! I managed to hold it together while being as loving as possible (!?) and to get something on the table—granted, it wasn’t anything that I wanted to eat, but it had a few food groups and some protein in there. Everyone filled their bellies, and my load seemed much lighter. I sat down after dinner to put my feet up (my recommended “rest” before bedtime rush). I was able to put everything in perspective, enjoy watching my children play together in the yard, and to thank God for providing me (again) with the grace to endure my blessings!
This stage of my life is not as carefree as Lucy’s staring at the sky/spinning stage, but it is crammed-full with sweet blessings and beautiful consolations, and I know I’ll endure for at least today! Thank you, God!
Blessed Mother, please watch over all mothers, especially when we feel overwhelmed with our blessings!
And let’s pray for each other, moms. I am praying for all who will read this as I write, and I would so appreciate it if you would say a quick one for our family as my due date approaches. Many thanks to this wonderful supportive online community!
Copyright 2013 Trish Bolster