Sometimes I get a little frustrated with the expectations of my older kids, the assumption that I’m waiting at home just to pick them up and take them somewhere or that I’d like nothing more than to give them the last $20 from an inconvenient cash machine, just so they can go have a little more fun. I get my back up with the sense of entitlement. The what-can-you-do-for-me-now over the how-can-I-help?
Sometimes, kids expect a lot. They have a lot, but they want more. They have a lot, but they expect more. A kid in a candy store can be a brat, but what if…
we’re called to be brats?
I often write my prayer. I read from a good spiritual book, jot down a couple lines of what I have just read (reflecting on what sticks out) and I write the Lord a question or two. Then, I write like my hand is on fire, hoping that even a fraction of the words I’m scribbling might pack a punch from the Holy Spirit.
Sometimes I’m blown away by these words …read weeks later.
Classical prayers read or by rote … are beautiful and way more articulate than me.
And probably the focus and care with which you say your Rosary fast-tracks you to holiness.
But my own very imperfect prayer from the heart fosters my relationship with Jesus and I’m brought to my knees by talking with Him and learning to listen. This quiet little answer in my heart on a bus in Rome is proof enough for me.
Kneeling before the Blessed Sacrament, looking at Him looking at me…sometimes, a connection appears right in front of me, just for me.
I see things that I struggle with in light of how they can actually make me pray better.
I discover other ways we’re called to be like little children.
That excites me more than I ever talk about.
So what does this have to do with being called to be a brat?
In my prayer, I’ve been directed to ask or plead for God’s Help less…and to pray with more gratefulness and expectation:
to assume that The Lord wants to answer my prayer,
to expect that He’s already on it,
and to realize my inherent worth and dignity as His Daughter.
I need to assume that The Lord already knows my need and just plain thank Him for what He’s already doing, even if I don’t have a grip on what that is and especially when it doesn’t match my little plan.
Expect more….heck….you know that attitude of entitlement that frustrates me sometimes in my kids? I need some of that… in the form of confidence to the point of audacity in God’s Love for me! (thanks St. Therese! You’ll read it in I Believe in Love by Fr d’Elbee).
If being a brat comes with a certain attitude of entitlement, assumption that He wants to answer my prayer and expectation that my needs will be met…maybe I’m called to be a brat?
Of course it’s all in the focus. I need to want what He wants for me; I need to will what He wills, I need to value what He values…just with the confidence of a child who knows she is loved and cared for by Jesus.
I need to…in all things, trust in Him.
Expectation that He’s got my back: OF COURSE He wants to help me in my current need and He’s got a better plan for me than I could ever come up with. And it’s really good.
He’s not looking for ways for me to earn His Good Graces (as hard as I try)… I’ve already got them.
He’s not setting up little tests or hoops for me to jump through.
He doesn’t talk to me in riddles or try to trip me up.
He wants me to get to Heaven even more than I do.
He’s placed the desire in my heart to know Him better and choose Him always so that maybe I’ll ask less and assume more….and trust in Him… all the way up the Escalator to Heaven.
Copyright 2015 Monica McConkey.
Photos Copyright 2015 Monica McConkey (www.equippingCatholicfamilies.com) All rights reserved.