Today’s Gospel: John 20: 1A, 2-8
I can relate to the many themes woven so richly into this Gospel: it is dark, it is early.
As a mama my prayers, my longings are often made in the darkness of the darkest nights and in the wee, early hours before anyone else is even awake.
I can especially relate to running to Jesus and quite often not finding Him where I, in my humanness, expect to find Him.
I know the urge to cry out: “Someone help me!” For haven’t they taken the Lord, my Lord, seemingly out of every inch of this world?
Out of schools and the judicial system, out of the hearts of His people?
Practically every one of us is a God-forsaken, empty tomb.
Prayers go unanswered, anxiety, depression and sadness get the best of us.
And then comparisons.
One disciple running faster than the other.
The “rock” vs. the one that Jesus loved best.
Clearly – if I can just press pause long enough and stop running long enough – I would realize that a MIRACLE has taken place.
THIS is a God Who keeps His promises and is held back by nothing.
Not even death itself.
There has been a RESURRECTION.
A rising up above these earthly, tangible things: linens left behind, placed neatly to the side.
Something for us to “see” and to be reminded.
A mysterious sense of order and PRESENCE, even in His absence.
Fullness in emptiness.
Life in death.
Yet has not this always been His way?
Hiding answers in contradictions, shaming the wise of this world so that those who truly believe will have to seek Him using solely the eyes of their faith.
How often, in my own “running”, do I succumb to the temptation to compare my spiritual progress to that of others?”
Lord, lead me into Your death and resurrection, but please don’t let me remain there. I want to come out with my faith in YOU as the way, the truth and the life restored.
Copyright 2016 Regan Ballin
I am mama to 3 sons and 2 daughters and Mimi to 2 precious granddaughters. I help my husband to run his small business while dabbling in photography, homeschooling, cooking and all things crafty (with a penchant for procrastinating.) Aside from Instagram @beautiful_ight and coffee being my biggest vices I have a very deep love for my Catholic faith.