I have an almost 11 month old “tiny” little baby.
He’s crawling and rolling all over the house and has an odd attachment to our Bluetooth speaker, which began one morning we were listening to the Rosary (that’s the only thing that keeps me from freaking out about this creepy new obsession.)
This little boy will be completely into his newfound treasure of the moment. I’ll catch his eye from the kitchen, he’ll drop that treasure out of his mouth, mad dash over to me, push himself up on his knees and stretch his arms out as far as they can go. He’ll break out into the biggest, happiest smile you’ve ever seen and beg for a hug.
Ohh, my heart.
Starting a couple of years ago, every now and then, I’d ask for the grace to really feel and understand God as my Father, Father.
So many times I get stuck in the motions of faith and who God truly is, that I miss the depth of His love.
I have no problem referring to God as my BFF, that was where my faith began, but the Father side of God is a side of Him I really have desired a deeper connection with.
One of the most beautiful things about a relationship with God are the quiet, hidden moments when He reveals Himself to you with a gentle touch to your heart. The subtle, “I am here.”
Just the other day my tiny little baby looked up at me with those big eyes, threw his chunky arms up and gave me the cheesiest “I love you!! Hold me!” smile.
I froze. I didn’t grab his tiny little body close.
I just stared at him … but I’m telling you … it was not my tiny little baby.
It was God.
It was God taking that subtle “I am here” moment to another place.
For years now I have been hearing people ask, “Do you know God the Father?”
Because I have never referred to God as my Father in my conversations with Him, I’ve thought, “No, no I don’t know God as my Father.”
In that mere second with tiny little baby, God moved like a tidal wave in my soul.
As I looked at my son, God asked me, “Why does this baby love you?’
And then, the epiphany.
My baby loves me and his Daddy because of who we are to him.
We are the people that feed him.
We are the ones that put snuggly pajamas on his body.
We hold him tight after a bump of his head.
We give him the baths that refresh him.
We are the ones he trusts.
He loves us because he loves us.
He loves me because I am his Mommy.
He loves his Daddy because he’s his Daddy.
It’s so simple.
Tears streamed down my face.
I know God as my Father. I have always known God as my Father.
I thought I had been missing out on that huge part of my relationship with Him because I’ve never referred to Him as Daddy, but that’s just not true.
Lately I have been feeling guilty about the reasons I love God.
I felt like the love I have for God was based on selfishness.
I love Him for the blessings He gives me and my family.
I love Him for the “God moments” He sends to brighten my day.
I love Him for the lessons He has taught me.
I love Him for how He takes care of me.
But, when my baby reached out for me in love that moment, I realized … I love God for the same reasons my baby loves me.
I, too, put down my newfound treasures of the day, reach my arms out to Him in love, and beg Him to love me back …simply because He IS my Father.
I love Him because He IS my Father!!
God, I love you … you are my Daddy.
In the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen.
Copyright 2018 Stephanie Stovall