As a mother of three grown children, it is a pleasure to see the ones that are doing good, but to see any of my children struggle is heartwrenching. For years, our youngest has been struggling with life. Oh, how I love her dearly and my heart pains for her. Sometimes I think it would be so simple if she would just listen to me. I’ve been around a few times and have some sage advice for her. But when I give it to her, she just shrugs her precious shoulders and proceeds in the pathway she has been paving for the past eight years as she has documented in some of her writings.
A couple of years ago, my older daughter and I attended a retreat hosted by our parish. The speaker, Jackie Angel, spoke about the 54-day Rosary novena and how she prayed for things important to her with this novena. At one point, she talked about people who are passionate sinners make passionate saints. I immediately thought of my youngest. That has stayed in my mind since then. No matter how fervently I pray for my daughter, God is working with a plan in mind for her that I don’t know. I am sure of this.
Our daughter is a passionate thinker, and she writes beautifully. Even her pain is expressed in beautiful penmanship. She has a beautiful voice and led the parish in prayer during Mass for a couple of years before she turned 18. Her skill at the keyboard is amazing, and she was the stand-in for churches around town when their regular pianist was away — and she performed like a pro. Even one pastor gave her an opportunity to sing a song she had written from a psalm for the “altar call.” My husband and I were moved to tears at the beauty of her voice and piano in front of this lucky congregation.
Today, three years later, I mourn for that young lady. I mourn for her struggle and pain. The darkness that overshadows her potential for joy and hope. There are days, oh so many days (what time is it?) that I am kneeling at the side of my bed in deep, desperate prayer for her to be freed of this turmoil and for the Lord to hurry up and finish the honing of her calling.
Dear God, please hurry up and give her your hope! Have mercy on this child of mine; it pains me so to watch much more of this! Pass this cup from her and give her the strength to endure and keep going to find the light of your presence in her life!
Oh, how I pray!! I sigh, then realize that it is in His time, not mine.
Is there someone in your life that is struggling? How are you coping? Please share!
Copyright 2019 Ebeth Weidner