In my thirteen years as a mom, I have discovered that it is very much like reaching milestones in human development. I remember anxiously talking to pediatricians, friends, and reading books about when and how my son would reach his developmental milestones.
I wanted to learn all about what I could do to help my son not only reach the milestone, but also be great at it too. I remember getting nervous when I didn’t see him exhibiting certain behaviors and then looking them up in books I checked out of the library or owned.
Now I realize, that even though it is good to be aware of our child’s development, it is not good to worry about it. I know that as a mom, I surely learned a lot about motherhood at my own pace and have stumbled many times along the way.
My son could definitely be worried about how my mom skills have developed or are still developing, and could call me out at the many times I didn’t hit my mommy milestone.
On my mothering journey there have been times I yelled and got impatient instead of responding to his needs. The many times I jumped to conclusions about a situation instead of listening and being present for him.
These are only a few of my many misses as a mom. In reflecting about this, I heard God say, “It’s the journey and the willingness to learn and grow.” Thankfully, I have learned a lot from many friends about learning from my mistakes, and am willing to learn new ways to be a mom to my son.
It takes a lot of humility to be willing to say that as a mom you don’t know it all and that you are learning to be the best mom for your son on earth.
I’m glad that God has given me the grace so that I could learn how to be present for him and guide him on the way.
I thank God every day for trusting me with His son on this earth.
Copyright 2020 Elizabeth Estrada