Spring Cleaning

It began innocently enough – two moms sharing the woes of spice cupboards-you know, the ones whose little glass bottles immediately spill over when one is looking for that last illusive ingredient for supper at six and it is now five forty(okay so this is my issue, my friend’s cupboard is infinitely more precise and user friendly). Anyhow, next thing I know Leslie bursts forth with many practical, smart and easy ideas for changes that would certainly bring new life and joy to my tiny, yet lovable and lived-in kitchen.

She graciously gives me a full afternoon of precious mom time to aid me in a thorough clean out and re-organization! Lots of items to recycle… I now have a pantry and everything seems close at hand and convenient.

Providentially, I also had a visit with another smart and savvy mom I know who introduced me to “Joy of Less” by Francine Jay. Lena’s home (mom of four youngsters under the age of 6)is remarkably neat, clean and free of clutter so, of course, I sought her “secret”. Over the last few years, Lena has made lots of decisions about “material stuff” motivated and inspired by Francine’s tips about considering the usefulness and lovability of all material goods. Does this particular item really deserve a place in our home? Is this something I use on a regular basis? Clear surfaces, a place for everything and everything in its place are mantras we have all come across but at the right time for our families, they may resound more loudly.

Managing a household of six children (an eclectic mix of ages, stages, passions and temperaments) and celebrating 25 years of marriage and mourning our baby Francis and sifting through all that I was “saving” for him-now seems to be the right  time for this Mom.

Another friend, Holly, shared with me her wardrobe transformation… project 333, that is: 33 items (clothes, shoes, outerwear, jewelry) for 3 months. Box the rest up until a re-assessment in a few months. Yes, ladies-I have a neat closet with more open space. Everything coordinates and makes picking an outfit easy and fun. I am also making more use of these items in new creative ways and it’s fun!

It is remarkably satisfying moving about in a home that is more efficient and user-friendly. As a homeschooling family we make a lot of use of all of our spaces. Conscious decision-making about what is and what is not important in our day-to-day walk is a skill I want to pass along to my children.

How I use this renewed sense of space and time will undoubtedly be a challenge. May God guide me to a spiritual spring cleaning that will help me prepare for my real home in eternity.

Blessings to you and yours for a warm and happy springtime!

Copyright 2013 Cathy Craig

Mother to Mother

Many times during this life I have felt myself blessed. I have many loved ones, friends, and close family members. My spouse is one committed and Christ-like. I have life and health.

Despite this knowledge and gratefulness, I find myself once again reflecting on just how wonderfully I have been supported over the last months since the death of my precious Francis Edward, age 11 months. The little man had a heart defect that was inoperable and as our pediatric cardiologists described, “a complex heart.” Alas, he is no more on this earth.

Particularly this day I think about and am grateful for a mothering community that surrounds  my family and how  their giftedness blesses us time and again, in joy and sorrow, in fun and times of great strain, and, now, in grief.

There is my Mom who is a whiz at thinking logically and rationally but is a sensitive soul who trusts God about everything. She is generous and practical. I rely on her good sense, wit and wisdom so she was the person I called to meet us at hospital after Francis had died at home and attempts to revive him by myself and professionals were unsuccessful. She brought a backpack with prayer book, water, energy bars, a rosary, etc. She dubbed herself our witness. Many times since Oct. 10 I have asked her to describe a particular aspect of that morning or perhaps some nature of the events surrounding it.

There is another Mom whose phone number I’ve had committed to memory for many years. This Neighborhood Mom has made herself available whenever I may have had the need to call for backup during a number of pregnancies. And now it was of essential use during a different kind of deliverance. She was the Mom we called to come and be with our children at home while Lynden and I accompanied Francis to hospital. This Mom brought the children to her home, fed them, read to the little ones and offered solace as needed in an unknown and scary situation for our family.

Who knew that a new friend in Mothering had worked as a professional in a palliative care unit? This Mom understood and accepted before I did. She has made herself available to e-mail, talk, lunch and cry. She has good resources to share and is a valuable person to discuss medical and logistical matters about the reality we face and are working through.

Of course, there are my “Team Moms”… a small band of women who meet regularly to study, pray and celebrate life. We attempt to commit to Christ and to each other in  authentic ways that reflect the belief that it is through our vocation of marriage and motherhood that God calls each to live His message in the world. I thank one of my Team Moms for a daily mainstay lately… the inspiration to loan me the book, “Healing the Greatest Hurt” by Matthew Linn, Dennis Linn and Sheila Fabricant. This book gives me hope when thinking of continuing my journey in life without my beloved Francis. It reminds me of the rich heritage of our Church and the communion of Saints and how loving my little guy was real and continues to be real in the Love of Christ.

And, of course, Moms are practical. Food provision for my family was instant and abundant. My Highly Organized and Resourceful Mom made a schedule that provided for a hot, fresh meal on our evening table for at least six weeks. This comfort food truly lived up to its name. More than once I felt a Eucharistic connection when experiencing the loving nature of these gifts of time and talent.

Yes, my reflection includes a Mom who perseveres in dropping in once a week or so to chat or because she is “in the neighbourhood.” We share a cup and a treat she may have brought and catch up. I know she is present to me and listening and when the tears began she was also there.

I feel cared for and watched over by my Walking Mom. “How is my mother’s heart these days?” she asks as we meander through the neighbourhood. Her steps become a prayer for me.

My Online Mom friend prayed for Francis long before he saw the light of this world. She consoles when I reach out and I trust her insights. I have never heard her voice and yet she speaks loudly to my heart.

And it is to all those Moms who have thought about, prayed for and supported myself and my family in many hidden ways over the last months who I am most grateful for as I end this day. To all of you, many of whom are part of the catholicmom.com community, I offer my humble gratitude and love in return.

Copyright 2013 Cathy Craig

Little Francis

This month I present to you a little write-up about a little guy who lived in this world a relatively little time. We miss him terribly. But with some mysterious Grace and a dose of imperfect faith and hope in the Paschal Mystery, we understand that only through death comes true lasting Abundance. The hope of my husband and myself is that we continue to embrace the Abundance that is our family life.

Eulogy for Francis Craig Penner: 27 October 2011 – 10 October 2012

Presented by Lynden Penner, Francis’ father, at the Funeral Mass, Holy Rosary Cathedral, Regina, SK, 13 October 2012

Mission accomplished by a special little guy

Thank-you Father Lorne and thank-you to all family and friends for being here with us today.

I’d like to share a few words with you about our dear Francis.

Francis is the seventh of our children, being born on October 27, 2011, one day after his dad’s 50^th birthday.

Even before he was born we knew Francis had some issues with his heart, so we were grateful for the birth of an otherwise healthy full-term baby. After an initial stay at the Stollery Children’s hospital in Edmonton immediately after birth, Francis enjoyed a happy life with his family. Because of his complex heart condition we knew his life would likely be shortened but expected many years with him. He was a very content, delightful baby – wonderful to hold and cuddle, never really cried or fussed as Cathy cared for him tenderly and met his every need as she has with all of our children, and the rest of the family anxiously waited for their turn to hold him and give him their loving attention.

By faith we know that none of us is here by accident, and that we all have a special purpose that only we can fulfill. Some have many years to discover and fulfill their mission and others only a short time. During his short time with us, and even before he was born, Francis put is in contact with many people and situations we would never have experienced without him; he gave us an opportunity to love and care for him; he drew us close as a family and closer to extended family and friends; and he gave other people opportunities to fulfill what they have been called to do. We are grateful to all those that have supported us, especially family and friends that have often dropped everything at a moments notice to help when we called.

We thought and hoped Francis would be with us much longer, and we miss him dearly, but we are grateful for the gift of his life and the beauty, love and joy he brought us. Peace be with our special little guy.

Copyright 2012 Cathy Craig

Here I am, Lord

“Here I am” is my constant prayer companion today. I heard it this morning at mass with my crew – the wiggly, wily ones. Looking into my wiggly son’s eyes and connecting on a level that only he and I share, I realized that as distracting as we are to others, as little time for quiet contemplation as I have, as shocking as my nursing baby is to some, “Here I am, Lord.”

Is showing up enough for our Lord? Can He take what little I have left and use it for his purpose? God, make it so! I am pondering a book this summer, “The Practice of the Presence of God,” writings by Brother Lawrence in a contemporary English version (published by Paraclete Press). For Brother Lawrence times of meditation and retreat were no more or less fruitful in his connection to Christ than his round of daily tasks. And his round of daily tasks was sometimes truly tedious and daunting in the extreme. His thoughts were always on Christ… when distracted, he would continually align his mind and motives.

Here I am to receive You in my humility and in my imperfection. Here I am in my flesh for your flesh.

In some mysterious way, I yearn for Christ to be part of me today. My faith is weak; my prayer is imperfect, but “Here I am Lord!” My domestic church has many challenges – physical, emotional and spiritual, helping to meet the needs of all ages and stages from 9 months to 20 years. It keeps me hopping and humble. My hope lies in the promise of Grace.

Hopefully showing up to my life and mission with an open heart and open hands will allow Christ to enter into my life – “Here I am Lord.”

Brother Lawrence, pray for us!

Copyright 2012 Cathy Craig

Keep in mind that even though my young son was carefully monitored and was thought to perhaps require life-saving cardiac surgery, he was for the most part stable and larger/older than most babies on the unit. So I have the luxury (by God’s Grace) to be able to reflect on my experience without the heavy heart of many moms and dads on the unit.

One mom, for instance, shared that she had been on the unit with her newborn for 3 months. After 4 days of taking baby home from hospital when he was first born, she awoke to find him lethargic and blue-tinged. An undetected heart failure brought her to a place where she has nearly lost him 5 times. When finally she accepted that this child was God’s own, she was ready to accept, as well, whatever was to come with fortified strength. She finds comfort in pumping milk for him even though she cannot feed him and appreciates all the time she has spent with her dear one, getting to know and enjoy him during the light and dark days. While I was in hospital, she lost a neighbour, a young dad serving in Afghanistan. The strength and faith of this young mom amazes me.

And then there is the first-time mom who has a full-term baby with half a heart…a problem detected in utero. She shared that she was under a lot of pressure to abort this child but refused. She and her husband have been looking forward to beginning their family for 8 years. This child continues to improve with modern surgical procedures and advanced medicine.

A chaplain on the ward describes situations where people of no faith background desperately seek spiritual consolation and hope during these times when all that remains is hope. So like the paschal mystery that we all celebrate during this season, out of suffering comes our greatest prize. How many miracles of renewed faith has this person witnessed?

A wonderful, caring, family-centered and competent staff is a marvel to behold. I am blessed to receive care here. Yet despite their professionalism and all they are doing for me, I am quick to judge on the basis of a few scant words and smiles or lack thereof. When you are living at the bedside of a wee one, it’s important who is there with you. Is she/he smiling, friendly, open to my requests about holding, feeding my baby? And, of course, doctors, housekeepers ,x-ray, pharmacy all get my scrutiny! I have been wrong about people. They know what they are doing and they do, indeed, care even if I don’t ”feel” they do at first glance.

Having said that, I do, indeed know my baby better than they and sometimes it will take them part of a shift or so to catch up to the history and the news. In the meantime, I am there to fill them in and continue to sooth and ease whatever may face my Francis this day.

A final mini-miracle to make our stay here positive…we were waiting for the ductus valve to close in my little guy’s heart. An echo cardiogram was done everyday to monitor it’s closure. In the event his already narrowed aorta could not handle the flow of blood to the rest of his body, emergency surgery would be required immediately. During what turned out to be our last echo, the operator stopped midway in his tracks, said something like, ”oh, that’s interesting” what could this mean?

I immediately began to pray the Hail Mary over and over…I couldn’t find words. The technician says he thinks the ductus closed while he was watching! Wow, a weight had been lifted. After 24 hours more of observation and data collection, Francis and I were air lifted to our home hospital.  We will continue to be monitored in our home province as he does have another heart defect that will require surgery when he is older and bigger( 40% of kids with Down syndrome need this surgery so it is not unusual for our guy). But this is a safe, family friendly place and it will be good to have other future needs met here.

Blessings galore! Many praying souls and kindnesses during our difficult time make us realize that we can be confident that the resurrection has indeed already happened. All will be well.

Copyright 2012 Cathy Craig

Dropped jaw is the immediate first physical detection. My wonderful friends, family and acquaintances who view life as a gift are full of smiles and exclamations as if this is my first!  What a joy these people are and how wonderfully I am blessed by them. These special individuals fill a mother’s heart so she can continue to persevere with a smile when others pose the usual:

Was this planned? (God’s plan to be sure).

Are you and baby going to be okay? (Really, no guarantees here).

You must be a little sheepish because there are so many ways to prevent pregnancy… (Actually, we are open to life and trust the Father).

Well, so long as the baby is healthy… (actually, this baby is loved by us beyond its health, sex, age, physical characteristics, but more importantly by God who formed him before we even knew of him).

But what if it’s another one like Peter? (To this we say, “Yes, please”. Peter is our five year old who has Down Syndrome, another love of our lives).

This new baby of ours surrounded by the mystery that is God’s creation is loved and cherished already.  There is no doubt that there is some anxiety and level of suffering that comes with all pregnancies and the older mom has some unique concerns. But healthy or not, short or long lifespan, this little one is one of the clan and part of the plan!

You must be so tired… Well, of course I am tired. I am a busy mom in an eventful household but I am also wise enough and practiced to prioritize, and have had enough experience to know my limits and what is truly important to expend my energy. This baby and my other babies are definitely important enough…

And what if I had no children and was a busy executive that travelled with work and had great demands, physical and mental, to deal with on a day to day basis? Do I sound jealous? Not really, but some days we all want to change places.  My point is that in any vocation there are high demands, opportunities for sacrifice and a great need for grace.  This is my path, the special one that God has led me along and I humbly ask to reach Him at the end!

Copyright 2011 Cathy Craig

The cute little guy looked curiously but not with any particular regret. Really, he had just been curious right? And his curiosity about what would happen if he pushed this big tin had indeed been sated.

So to minimize further damage, I simply lifted Peter upstairs to his sleepy siblings,took off my clothes and proceeded to wipe off those yellow walls before the red began to dry.  And I was somewhat successful.The carpet, well, that is a lost cause to be sure!

This minor household disaster even beat my exploding squash for dire consequences. Of course, had it not been myself who opened the oven that held the hot commodity but one of my children, perhaps the splattering that covered the kitchen and was found by bits and pieces even up to months later would have been injurious to them. Thanks for small mercies every day.

And seeing the curiosity and impishness of my little guy and how much he delights us;  I think about how our Heavenly Father delights in all of us. Oh, not that we don’t mess up because of course we do…but if we love our little (and big) ones to the extent that nothing they ever do could separate our love from them, how much more does Perfection love us beyond all imagining?

A comforting thought to this mom. What a blessing to be a parent and experience even a smidgen of what it is like to love unconditionally. As Christians, we have such an example to follow, Jesus who gave  His life for His brothers and sisters. I can be more patient and attempt to practice more virtue if I only think about how my Heavenly Father parents me. It also means that no longer must even my own parents or grandparents need to be perfect because I know I am perfectly loved by one who truly created me.

We are instructed as Christians to strive to be perfect as is our Heavenly Father. In this message for me is a reminder of my responsibility to make sure my children have a personal relationship with that perfect parent…who is Mary, Jesus, and the Father. Although I strive, human nature means until I get to heaven striving is all I can manage. But the perfect family already has created, loved and saved my child. Through my dependence on the Holy Spirit, my goal is to make sure all my children learn to know this wonderful Truth that can sets us all free.

Copyright 2011 Cathy Craig

At the same time in Canada, there is a lack of dignity afforded to the extremely  vulnerable .  Abortion is legal and purported to be a readily made alternative by obstetricians .  For example, when counselling parents whose babies have been prenatally screened for Down Syndrome, abortion is top choice. In fact, 90% of parents choose abortion in this category. As a parent of Peter, my four year old who happens to have this diagnosis, I can tell you that the world is poorer for it. The consequences are chilling.

This weekend my 14 year old daughter Josephine, celebrated her birthday by taking in an IMAX 3-D movie called Born to Be Wild. This mom gives the movie a 5 star rating and I am a very tough critic in all things media especially where my children are concerned. The storyline consists of the life journeys of two  women who in Kenya and Indonesia have raised baby elephants and orangutans back into their own environments. The animals are rescued when their own moms have been killed or poached . These babies are nurtured by knowledgeable keepers that provide a type of care that ultimately prepares the babies to return to their natural wild habitat.

I immediately thought of Mother Theresa and how she asked the world to bring her their unwanted babies. Her life was all about a similar ministering to the most vulnerable.

And so as my oldest daughter, Emily (19) and my oldest son, David (18) exercise their democratic right to vote for the first time this spring, I talk to them about checking the issues against their own values and concerns. Better yet, says Mom, why not begin the Life Party? This political organization determines the value of every course of action and decision-making based on how it upholds the dignity of human persons.  Economic challenges, social concerns, environmental decisions, strategies to deal with global issues, etc. Life can be a party and why shouldn’t it be?

Copyright 2011 Cathy Craig

But what is considered a large family?

You know you have a big family when you are repeatedly asked by grocery store clerks if you are having a party…”actually, everyday is a party at my house.”   And this, indeed, is true. Our family needs plenty of healthy snacks for budding athletes and busy toddlers and a mom who is nursing a baby.  One day an older gentleman in the grocery line poked an elbow at his wife and said,” Look at all that milk!” pointing to my over flowing cart… we go through 4 litres of milk daily at our home and are fortunate enough to be able to afford the necessary supply.  The aged woman was obviously disturbed at this little exclamation by her beloved, but I offered a reassuring smile and began a conversation about my family. I loved it! I find it a privilege to speak about my household anytime, and I feel so blessed that God has provided so well for my husband and I (I mean primarily in terms of provision of children, not finances but He has provided us in that way, too).

Again and again in our family life, my husband and I are outdone in generosity by our heavenly Father.  There was the time when our neighbour (a lawyer) provided us with top rate legal services incredibly cheaply when we dared to take our local department of social services to task during their attempts to put our foster daughter’s best interests behind political initiatives.  This young child is now our adopted daughter, thanks be to God.

When our youngest son was born prematurely with a diagnosis of Down Syndrome and I subsequently spent several weeks in hospital with aspiration pneumonia, family, friends and strangers took over running the household and met our family needs which were abundant.  As we all know as mothers, people continue to need to be fed, clothed and comforted, especially at the most trying times.

You know you have a big family when the volume discounts always apply be it at supermarket dollar days, restaurants, and family holidays. At least this is what you tell yourself (and in my case, my husband) when the bill for a single family evening out matches the total monthly entertainment budget.

You know you have a big family when you and your husband transfer some parenting tasks to the “older kids.” There are the three categories of children at our house; the older kids, the little kids and the babies. I have a feeling these labels will be sticking even as the children grow older. One evening I was putting our little Peter to sleep in our bed.  My husband lay beside us from sheer exhaustion and we all were out.  A few hours later, we awoke to our 17 year old son yelling down the stairs to the babies and the little kids, “Shouldn’t you kids be in bed?” The “babies” had been playing piano and all manner of making noise. ”Should we intervene?” We parents looked at each other, paused briefly, and went back to sleep. Ah, the carefree life of the parents in a big family.

You know you have a big family when you and your husband are frequently mistaken for the grandparents. Let’s just say that we get to practice the virtue of humility. But who wouldn’t want to be associated with my terrific bunch one way or another? But when I am really older and in good shape from continuing to run a household, exercising my brain cells with high school math – then, we’ll see who gets the last laugh. Everyday of my life is a gift.  If I live long enough to be raising my loved ones in the next decade, well, what a lucky lady I will be.

Big families frequent free family swim times at local outdoor pools in the summer.  I in my shades and Dad in his cap, we are the spiffiest of tourists just barely out of our own back yard. We just go to that happy place where we are relaxed by the pool and again thankful for those sometimes hard fought swimming lessons (especially for the big kids). They are really paying off. ”Pass that water bottle, honey.”

You know you have a big family when everyone yearns for their own room (including mom and dad) but are faced with the certain knowledge that, in the lifetime of this family at least, there is absolutely no chance of that happy occurrence. But our Father in Heaven is readying a place for us.  If we don’t have our own rooms now, perhaps we will have them to enjoy on the other side. If not, well, I guess we have already learned to share.

You know a large family because they always have other families over to their home. They are the first to volunteer themselves (or perhaps more frequently their kids) for all manner of service in the Church, community and family. Generosity in openness to life spills over in every other aspect of family life.  Large families open themselves up to even more opportunities for selfless unconditional love.

But large families aren’t really measured by numbers. Indeed, you are a part of a big family even when you are a widow, a lonely teenager, an aged couple or a single father.  The Body of Christ is the largest of families, and if we learn to live with each other in Christ in this life then we can certainly anticipate an unparalleled family reunion in the next. Amen.

Copyright 2011 Cathy Craig

Gospel Meditation on Mt. 16:13-19:  The Chair of St. Peter

I thank you Father for all the ways in which you have blessed me in this life.  First and foremost I thank you for the gift of life and love. Please allow your generosity to me to be reflected in even the smallest way in my walk today.

I long and hope for one day to see you, to directly experience the light of your love in paradise with loved ones who have gone before me.  May I always seek and protect your gift of faith that I may foster and grow in the experience of your Grace.

I long for you to preserve and perfect the gift of love in my life.  Thank you for loving me. I return it to you in my imperfect attempt to love all whom I meet today.

“Who do the people say that I Son of Man is?”

As I ponder this question, I must ask how my life answers this question. Christ is my God, my savior. How can my life speak this in my thoughts and actions today?

Simon Peter said in reply,”You are the Christ the Son of the living God.”Jesus said to him in reply,”Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah.  For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my heavenly Father”…

Here I am reminded that any faith I may have received is gift.  My response is gratitude and humility.  The gift of faith is supernatural and where does that leave my efforts both as an apostle and a believer?

Firstly, Judgement of others has no place in my life as a Christian.  For my gift of faith and ,in turn, any gifts I may have received are given to me by Christ. My role as a believer is to foster the virtue of gratitude and be sure that today my actions and words be born of knowledge that I am at the mercy of my Father in Heaven.

How can I communicate my love and gratitude to my children and spouse today? How about to those who annoy me or my enemies?

“And so I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my Church…”.

For the slightest moment I insert my own name in the above passage.  For as sure as Peter is the rock on which the Church was established so do I as a fleck of sand hold some responsibility as an apostle of Christ.  Am I able to see myself in this moment in my life as a person who can show all whom I meet today a reflection of Christ’s love for them?  In gratitude and humility, how can I live charity today? Who needs my care and attention today? What is my responsibility in the mini domestic Church that is my family?

“I will give you the keys to the Kingdom of heaven.  Whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in Heaven.”

It is only by the Grace of Christ Himself that I am saved.  He gives this gift to me again and again through the sacraments.  When I fall, it is through the gift of reconciliation that I can run to Him and be renewed. This becomes my ultimate source of hope and joy.  Christ awaits me and as I put one foot in front of the other today, I must ask myself if it is to reconciliation that He leads me.  Amen

Copyright 2011 Cathy Craig

Jesus, I thank you for this day and this moment with you.  I believe you have something to impart to me.  Most of all, I desire your gift of love.  I hope that I can hear and understand your message and live as you desire me to…I hope in your mercy and promises of eternal life.  I love you, Jesus and I offer all that I am and have to your service.  Help me and all men and women who yearn for you to do your will in their lives, to grow close to you in deed and word.

Despite the actions of Christ up until this point in the Gospel, the disciples continue to find the reality of His kingdom difficult to believe.  They desired glory and praise for keeping the company of Jesus and following His path.  And do not I continue to seek a path of ease , joy and comfort even as a Christian apostle?  In my vocation as wife and mother it is only when I am able to authentically give myself in  generousity that true joy and peace is found.

So if not for esteem and glofy in this world, how am I to go about in my daily life as a follower of Christ?  Christ presents a child as both the way I am to be as a woman and whom I am to love unconditionally.  First, with childlike trust and innocence, I come to the Father.  I can trust Him completely with all my needs, ask Him how I am to go about, what I am to say and how I am to act.  Christ, I offer you myself every day to do the Father’s will.  I can only hope to find some success by the gift of your Grace.Just as Hannah emptied and offered her child, so  I offer my children, my mothering to You for your protection, love and use for Your work in this world.

As a woman  in the world, whom do I mother? To mother is to love…I am to mother my children, the sinful, the unlovable, the ugly, those who despise me, those who hurt me, my enemies, my friends ,my neighbours, and strangers in my path.  I am to love all like the children I mother daily.  I must imagine that they are as helpless and as in need of my charity as my own little ones.

In my vocation, God has blessed me with what John Paul II named the feminine genius…the blueprint to love imprinted in my heart.  And so God has gifted me and countless others with the key to the kingdom…to be loved as a child and , in turn, to love a child.  May God continue to share His gifts with us all!

Copyright 2010 Cathy Craig

We brought Shauntell home from hospital as a foster child. One day I brought her to the Social Services department for a visit with her birth mom.  I was also on the way to see a physician about the baby’s medical condition.  Immediately Lynn sensed that Shauntell was irritable and needed her foster mom and insisted I carry on to our doctor’s appointment giving up what precious little time she had to bond and enjoy this new baby.

When Lynn’s social worker thought it was time for her birth mom to “try ” a night visit with Shauntell, Lynn called us to pick up the baby when she found it difficult to cope.  She demonstrated great humility and courage in putting this child’s needs above what must have been her own need to mother and feel capable.

Lynn’s legacy is the child she shared life with and although Lynn is deceased; she will always be remembered in our family as a woman who left light in the world despite her own life of suffering and darkness.  And from her gift springs hope.

The child she bore will become a well –grounded woman of virtue, a leader in her family and community.  She will always uphold the dignity of life in all its stages because of her birth mother’s legacy of love.


Copyright 2010 Cathy Craig

Editor’s Note:  Today, we welcome new contributor Cathy Craig to our CatholicMom.com family of writers.  Cathy hails from Saskatchewan, Canada and is a homeschooling mom of six.  I’m thrilled that she’ll be joining us each month to share her unique perspective.  Please join me in warmly greeting Cathy!  Lisa

It is a cold blustery October morning and I am having a wonderful time hanging my laundry outside to dry.  I am so thankful for this time– a time to treasure each piece of fabric and the owner of each, as well as the memories and impressions that naturally come to mind.  There are curtains with tiny bright red, blue and yellow flowers that I laboured over when we moved into a quaint rental home only to move out a short six weeks later early in our married life.  In the last 20 years, these curtains have provided cheerfulness in many rooms for many ages and stages of family life.

And then I reflect that these same colors, chosen for that first, rather imperfect sewing project, are still a favourite combination in our present home.  Isn’t it amazing that even as we grow older, often our likes/dislikes/personalities remain constant despite many temporal changes?  I must remember that about my own aging relatives and friends.

I love fingering the clothes of my beloved husband and children.  Each piece gives me a flash of emotion about how this is a favourite of David’s or how it used to be someone else’s. My, this is becoming small on Peter (mother’s mental note: add to shopping list).  I have a quiet moment to pray for each child’s intentions in a personal way while at the same time delighting over and pondering their uniqueness.

Perhaps the only better part of hanging wet clothes is removing them dry.  That glorious freshness! The kingdom of heaven is indeed in this moment.  Thank-you Jesus for this brief moment in time.  It is all I have, isn’t it?  Will the Home you are preparing for me have this heavenly scent?

It really is brutally cold out here on my deck, and my hands are stiff and sore as I pull on the rope attached to my clothesline pulley.  I am so thankful for my warm home that awaits.  But what about other mothers with no homes and nary an item to dry, no warmth awaiting?  My cold hands I offer in service.  I give my hands to Christ and invite Him to use me this day.

Was Mary cold?  Did Elizabeth hang her family’s clothes to dry?  St. Therese laboured for her birth family and her sisters in Christ.  I cannot know the intimate lives of saints but our humanity can be united in the simple tasks.  Our Lord lived a human life.  God willing we will never intimately know His suffering but with Him, too, because of shared humanity, when we feel lonely, cold, afraid, we are nearer Him and he with us.

There are many days of stress and feelings of loneliness and yes, even despair within the vocation of marriage and motherhood.  I love my secret escape.  I enjoy a few minutes of solitude, meditation, and thanksgiving on my porch.

“Hi Mommy!”  “Mom, what  are you doing out there?”

Because God is good and I have the good blessing of a life enhancing mini-retreat.

Did I mention, I hang my laundry out all year long?


Copyright 2010 Cathy Craig