The 4th graders taught me that they were eager to learn about God and about our Catholic faith. They understood the call to serve others and shared with me how they would serve someone in their family this week. I can’t wait to hear what they share with me about their experiences. The children that were normally quiet and reserved in class opened up and shared their faith and beliefs with me. It was very touching how they revealed how they were going to live Christ-like lives.

The Confirmation class shared with me that they wanted to be Confirmed and what it meant to them. They shared with me their desire to continue on their spiritual journey by volunteering in the Church and in the religious education program after Confirmation.

In my online class I became more aware of my own desire to share our faith. I realized so many people long to learn about our faith and to share our faith with others as well.

I find being a Catechist one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. I love sharing our faith, seeing the joy and love spring forth in the children, the surge of peace in adults and my own faith continuing to grow.

Although our current school year is about to end I encourage everyone to prayerfully consider becoming a Catechist. Without the help of Catechists we cannot pass on our faith to the future of our Catholic faith…our children. Not only will you help share our faith and your love of God, you might be surprised to find that you will learn and grow in your faith just as much as the students.

Copyright 2013 Lorrie Lane Dyer

The first group that comes to my mind is the men and women of our military forces. Oddly, I’ve come across a lot of people who feel those in the military have it made. They believe we receive many free benefits. Our benefits may appear free but believe me, they are not. The men and women of our military and their families make many sacrifices in order to receive the benefits they do. Military men and women and their families receive lower pay than they would compared to someone doing the same job in the civilian world. They are on call to work 24/7 with no overtime. They deploy, leaving behind their families to manage things independently, most fairly far away from family and friends. Losing some of their benefits will affect these families who are already making less than their civilian counterparts. Government civilian employees will take a significant loss of pay with the sequestration as well.

Looking in to the future, we might ask: how can we help one another make it through these difficult times? Our chapel is looking at making a Food Pantry to help those out as they adjust to the changes. Although I am saddened by the difficulties ahead and that it’s affecting so many people (even students getting student loans will see increases on fees and military members will no longer receive tuition assistance) Lent seems to be an appropriate time for us to look at how we can ease the burdens of those affected by this.

I like the idea of our Food Pantry. It gives everyone in the military community an opportunity to look beyond concern for oneself to realize this is affecting everyone. If we join together for a common cause, like the Food Pantry, we can help ease the burden, even if just a little. It’s also important for us to realize that the civilian community we shop, go out to eat in and support will also be affected by our inability to spend as much as we used to. I think it would be great if as a community we could unit and face these times of difficulty through prayer, service to one another and love. For me, that begins with prayer and continuing to be an advocate for the Food Pantry.

Many of us may not be able to give as freely and may wonder what can we do to help others in need. I am a big advocate for prayer and sharing in what we do have. Inviting a family over for dinner or joining in praying the Rosary at Church or creating a group that unites and looks for ways to help others in the community are great starts to help each of us through the difficult times ahead of us.

Copyright 2013 Lorrie Lane Dyer

Reflecting on Mary in Advent

As we begin our third week of Advent the Holy Family comes foremost in my thoughts.  Specifically, this Advent Season, my thoughts bring me to Mary.  Mary has provided us with the perfect example of a good mother.  Mary had the wisdom of an elder and tenderly cared for Jesus in a manner that supported his ministry in life; even with the knowledge of the suffering he would endure and the heartache she would feel due to his plight in life.   Often I think we believe because of her unique role in salvation history that we cannot ever expect to follow in her footsteps.  But I believe this is inaccurate.

Mary embraced motherhood from a young age.  I can’t even begin to imagine becoming a mother at 13.  It was a big enough change when I was 20.  Mary willingly and selflessly gave up her childhood for each and every one of us.  She lovingly cared for Jesus as he grew within her womb.  She surrounded herself by Elizabeth, a loved one that understood the miracles of God.  From a young age, Mary embraced motherhood.

Reflecting on my own life as a mother, especially when being a mom is hard, I keep in mind Mary at the foot of the cross.  Mary walked along with Jesus as he carried his cross.  She never left his side, always loved him, prayed for him, even when it would have been easier to walk away instead of staying to endure the suffering and pain along side him.  Mary provides me with the best example of being a mother.  She reminds me that although my children have their own paths and own crosses to bare that I can remain with them, loving and praying for them.  Even though two of my children are young adults and it would be easier to walk way instead of watching them stumble along the path, I am reminded of Mary.   Mary inspires me to remain faithful to each of them on their life journey.  To pray for them and like Mary, shed a few tears along the way.

Mary provides me with encouragement as a mother.  As I meditate on the life of Jesus, I can’t help but pause in amazement at how wonderful a mother and person Mary must have been.  After all, she was chosen to give birth to the Savior of the world!  This Advent Season I embrace the “Yes” Mary gave the angel Gabriel.  In awe, I look to her for continue guidance on being the best mom I can be.  In admiration, I look to her with the knowledge that I too can walk along the path of life with each of my children, sharing tears, heartache and pain but also the joyous memories of the first time I held them in my arms or the warm embrace they give me each time they walk through the door.  Most importantly I find great comfort that they too will find salvation in the life, death and resurrection of Christ.

Copyright 2012 Lorrie Lane Dyer

Season of Change

This summer was definitely a “Season of Change”.  All of these changes, both good and bad got me thinking about things changing, God’s plan and letting go.  Summer began with my Father coming to visit us for our kids’ graduations.  On the drive home from the airport told me he left my mom.  Although they never had a great relationship, I never thought this day would come.  Soon, we headed for my son’s graduation at the Air Force Academy, followed by my daughter graduating from high school within two days of each other.

As we began our journey back from my son’s graduation for my daughter’s graduation, we found out that our cat, Bobby had passed away.  Losing Bobby was really hard for my daughter because she found him when he was a little kitten and despite his naughty nature, she loved him to death.  This was especially difficult because last summer we lost our beloved Newfoundland, Roy.

The summer continued on with my dad leaving, my husband leaving, followed by my son leaving.  A lot of change in such a short time frame.  The “Season of Change” continued on with my mother-in-law passing away.  The next week my daughter was in a rollover accident and is lucky to be alive.  Recently,  I found out that I may not get to continue my job.  It is bittersweet.  I have given over seven years of my life towards this job but perhaps this too is part of the “Season of Change”.

I’ve reflected on everything that has taken place within the last few months and find comfort in God’s plan.  It might be hard to see on some days but I know he has wonderful plans for me.  He sustains me through the times of difficulty.  His words provide me with a comfort only He could give.  His presence fills me with hope for the future.

Changes that take place in our lives are just a part of life.  Some changes are more difficult than others to accept.  Some changes may seem like a bad idea at the time and may hurt but in the end, they reveal a change for the better.  Am I afraid of change?  Yes, most times, I am.  Yet, I know in my heart that this “Season of Change” is going to reveal new growth, growth where it did not exist and a deeper faith in God flowing forth like the rivers of spring.

Copyright 2012 Lorrie Lane Dyer

With summer comes warm days, ice tea, vacations and the inevitable move for military families. Saying goodbye to close friends is a routine and expected part of a military community. However, even with this knowledge, we are left feeling a familiar emptiness when one realizes their friends are no longer right next door.

A strong faith community creates relationships that cross thousands of miles and sometimes goes deeper than blood. The faith community of a military chapel builds upon common knowledge and experiences. We all know that one day we’ll have to say goodbye to a dear friend, that we’ll share the most precious of events with our faith families and support one another through the most difficult of times. Times unique to military families; times that perhaps “normal” (or civilians) will never know and can never completely comprehend.

Often military families live far away from their biological families. We don’t get to experience running over to Grandma’s when we need advice or an old family recipe. So a new kind of family is created. It is a family of common ground; families created out of a sort of necessity. We come to Church with the hope of finding a faith community where we feel welcomed, where a smiling face awaits us, with the hope of new friendships yearning to grow.

The faith community of a military chapel is different than any other I’ve experienced. These military faith communities welcome you with open arms, they understand the struggles of being a military family and they embrace you and your children with the warm love of God.

The faith and devotion found in military chapels, all over the world, is amazing. Beside the fact that almost every military chapel is pretty much an exact replica of the next; you’ll find the familiar feeling of being welcomed home. There are noticeable differences between a military chapel and a civilian Catholic church. For one, in a military chapel it stands primarily in a neutral appearance. However, when it’s time for Mass nothing is compromised. The Crucifix hangs behind the altar. The altar is prepared just as it would be in a civilian parish and in our case we share our statue of the Virgin Mary. The setting for Mass is very similar to that of a civilian Catholic church. A major difference is that we have a room called the Blessed Sacrament Chapel. Normally the Blessed Sacrament would be within view of the parishioners. In order to keep the Chapel neutral we have a special room that is devoted strictly to our Catholic faith. Here we have Jesus awaiting us in the Tabernacle. We have daily Mass and Baptisms in the Blessed Sacrament Chapel. The Blessed Sacrament Chapel is a special place. Often I find myself called to visit Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament Chapel. In this special place, I find peace; happiness and a special connection with God and my military community.

Within the walls of our military chapel, friendships develop as we grow in our faith and love of God. Being a part of a military chapel allows one opportunities that are unique to a military community. We share in the common knowledge and struggles of military life and we hold firm to one another and to our faith in God.

Copyright 2012 Lorrie Lane Dyer

Silently, I’ve debated the moral dilemma of celebrating death, even when it’s the death of someone who has done terrible things to innocent lives.  I think all of us can understand the desire to punish someone or to see them suffer for the pain and suffering they have caused us.  As I debate this, it brings me back to my childhood.  When I was eight my mom had acid thrown in her face and was shot in the head at close range.  She went into a coma and died.  My two sisters and I were suddenly left without a mother.  This act of violence affected each of us in a different way.  My older sister was ten and as an almost fifty year old woman, she still struggles with the death of our mother.  She has never been able to move past this loss and has allowed it to consume her life.  My younger sister was only two…the loss of our mother didn’t seem to affect her at all.  As the middle child, my mother’s death affected me right in the middle.  I mourned her death and talked to God a lot.   As I got older, my faith or love didn’t change.  With time I gained a greater understanding of what took place; it was a terribly sad way to die.  However, in all the years since her death, I’ve never longed to celebrate any harm that may have come to the lady who took my mother’s life.  It never crossed my mind.  Even though I know she took my mother’s life when she was a young woman and I know our mom never got to see us grow up and was never there for us when we needed her, feelings of hatred never developed toward the lady who took her life.  Yes, I’ve wondered how all of this affected her life and her own children’s lives.  I’ve wondered how she felt.  There have been times I’ve crawled in that secret place of sadness and pain but I know celebrating someone else’s pains or sufferings won’t bring our mother back.  It won’t bring back a single moment our mother has missed or all of the years she will miss.  I realize my mom’s life is just one life compared to the thousands that have been lost but the loss of that one life changed the course of the lives of many other people.

Morality comes to mind when I struggle to identify the feelings I’ve been experiencing.  I feel compassion and even understand why and how so many people rejoice in the death of an individual.  Yet, I am left questioning if celebrating the death of one individual is any more moral than when others celebrated the death of thousands.

Copyright 2011 Lorrie Lane Dyer

It is a bit confusing because when we are growing up, most of our parents try to teach us right or wrong.  We are taught that it is wrong to hit, wrong to take things from others without asking and wrong to lie.  Often, when we did these things and our parents asked us, “Did you hit your sister?” “Did you take that without asking?” “Are you telling the truth?”  Many times as we answered dishonestly; in doing so we felt a ping of discomfort inside.   In some cases our face told the truth regardless of what our words were saying.  I never liked the feelings of guilt.  Even to this day I don’t like to be dishonest.   Which leads me to the questions, is honesty always best?

Over the years I have struggled with how much information I tell a stranger and is it being dishonest when I don’t reveal everything about me?  With time I learned that I don’t have to tell everyone I meet everything about me; especially strangers.  That doesn’t necessarily mean I am misrepresenting myself or being dishonest.  Each of us is entitled to a little privacy and it is necessary to use discretion when revealing personal information.

When I was younger,  I found myself revealing everything about myself in order to be honest.  I think I was missing the point about honesty.  I still believe we should be truthful and not lie but experience has told me that a stranger doesn’t necessarily need to know everything about me.  As I pondered this, a scene from the Goonies came to mind.  The scene where the kid is being interrogated and he spits out every deed he has ever done wrong.  Did the bad guys really want to know all of those details, was it necessary?  No, on both accounts.

In life, we all make mistakes.  As Catholics we go to confession and are released from our sins.  Of course, there are times when we must make reparations for our sins or apologize to someone for our actions but I think with absolution and penance, come the freedom from the obligation of sharing every sin we’ve committed to every person we meet.  Revealing private information to a person comes with time, as we develop a sense of who the person is and nurturing a healthy relationship, based on trust.

Often I tell my children, your private information is yours.  You don’t have to reveal your entire life story to every stranger you meet.  Sharing personal information should be done between people you trust and have developed a relationship with.  Although it may seem like a contradiction, I stand firm on not hitting others, not taking things that aren’t yours and telling the truth.  It is such a fine line; I still struggle with to this day…always tell the truth but don’t reveal everything to everyone you meet…  Many times I still rely on that “ping” feeling inside and try to be honest in all ways, without always revealing everything.  Perhaps I am wrong; if so, I know God will continue to guide me on journey towards him in faith, truth and love.

Copyright 2011 Lorrie Lane Dyer

As I busied myself and was preoccupied with organizing travel, lodging, snacks, meals and supplies for the retreats; my only hope was that everyone would embrace what the Sisters were going to share with them.  The last thing on my mind was for me to experience God’s love through the Sisters.  Yet, God is always seeking ways to speak to us, to bring us closer to Him.

I enjoyed watching the teens spend a day with the Sisters singing, learning sign language to go with the songs, laughing and discovering God.  When teens leave with smiles on their faces, exchanging contact information and many “Thank you’s” you know something wonderful took place.  The next morning the younger kids got to experience the joy and love of the Sisters as well.  Again, they sang, learned signs and left with the love of God in their hearts.  The final retreat was the adult retreat.  Once again, I found myself observing in between my tasks.  This time I found tears in the eyes of adults, I witnessed changing hearts and a renewal of the Holy Spirit within them.  At one point the Sisters offered Scriptures to everyone.  A Sister offered me a scripture too.   The Sisters held the Scriptures in their hands face down and you selected the one you wanted.  You were then instructed to read it putting your name in it.  My Scripture was this, “Lorrie, the mountains may depart, the hills be shaken, but my love for you Lorrie, will never leave you.”  (Isaiah 54:10)  I thought this was a nice Scripture but didn’t think too much of it at the time.  Little did I know this verse would get me through some very difficult days.

After the last retreat I went back to my friend’s house where I was staying and began pondering all the wonderful things that had happened that weekend.  I knew those who attended the retreat shared the same love and joy of the Sisters and their ministry as I did.  I was content; this was a great weekend.

My contentment was soon put to the test though.  Later that night I received a call from home with some devastating news.  This news ripped my heart apart.  In the mist of receiving this news, the Scripture I was given suddenly popped into my mind.  I instantly felt comfort in the mist of chaos.  Over the next few days as I dealt with “Life” God’s words ran through my mind… “Lorrie, the mountains may depart, the hills be shaken, but my love for you Lorrie, will never leave you.”  These words reassured me that regardless of what was going on God would never leave me.  I knew these words were true and I knew that God would be always with me; standing strong, even when the mountains departed and the hills shook.

Copyright 2011 Lorrie Lane Dyer

There are times however, that I am easily distracted.  One of those times was recently.  I sat several pews behind a family; a father, teenage daughter and mother.  The entire mass, even during the Liturgy of the Eucharist, the father and daughter laughed, made fun of choir members and the priest.  This made me both angry and terribly sad.  Based on their behavior it appeared they didn’t believe God was present with us.  It was like he was some distant being that they must please through the obligation of attending mass

The next weekend I attended mass at another church.  As I listened to the homily a grown daughter and her mother came in.  They noisily scrunched pass people in the pews and found themselves near me.  I smiled and continued to focus on God’s word.  They continued to chatter so loud that no one nearby could hear or concentrate on what was being said.  This continued throughout the remainder of the mass.  As I sat there, my mind no longer able to focus on the Word, I observed people getting up, talking, coming in and out without regard to what was going on.

As I thought about both my recent experiences at different parishes it made me wonder what happened to the reverence of mass.  I will be the first to acknowledge there are times my mind is a million miles away.  However, I don’t believe I take away from someone else’s time with God.  Perhaps others share this thought as well.  These experiences have helped me re-evaluate mass.

Attending mass allows us to give one hour of our week to God and to let go of all else for that one hour.  That’s hard to do.  How can we come into God’s house and give him our undivided attention?  As I pondered this question a thought came to mind.  I thought of visiting a friend.  I thought of how I would feel if I visited a friend and they ignored me the entire visit.  What if my friend not only ignored me, they talked over me, talked to others and just got up and left while I was mid sentence?  How would I feel?  I would feel sad and wonder why I was visiting, unless there was something urgent going on.  I can’t help but believe that God must feel the same.  It probably saddens him to see so many people come to mass and so few truly give him that one hour.  Unfortunately, no one escapes from being that person at one time or another.

I think the next time I go to church and find myself distracted I will think of God, of his sacrifices for me.  I will no longer be concerned with what those around me are doing.  After all, this hour belongs to God and God alone.


Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

I admit as I have gotten old, lived life a little I’ve come to realize that there are many things in life that can’t be explained.  Often we are bombarded by the bad of the world.  No one can explain why a child loses his or her life at the hands of another.  No one can explain to a loved one why their husband, wife, son or daughter was suddenly taken away.  These remain the mysteries of life that we cannot find resolution to.  We just have to come to terms with the fact that we can’t understand everything in life.

No doubt, for me and other likeminded thinkers, this makes accepting things a little more difficult than the individual that can look at a situation and say, “This isn’t fair, I don’t like it but I have to accept it.”  Often we look out to the world and to others to find answers in our own lives.  What I’ve recently discovered is that while I’ve been searching for various answers, often critiquing others, my life has been going forward full swing.  I’ve busied myself with a lot of outside projects.  I am busy from the moment I wake up to the moment my head hits the pillow.  I do get my daily prayers in but it is usually when I am doing something else.  I used to pride myself on all of the multitasking I did throughout the day.  I could look back over my day and say, “Wow, I got a lot accomplished today!”  But what are those tasks that I rush through my day to ensure were done?  How is what I am doing making life better for someone else, for those I love?  I guess the bottom line is; is what I do for my benefit or the benefit of others?  As I go about my busy day do I share my love of God with those I come in contact with?  Am I truly serving God or am I serving myself?

As I was saying at the beginning of this story, I’ve been making a conscious effort to observe my responses to different situations in my life.  I’ve decided I wanted to see what is really going on in my life.   I truly want to become a better person.  In order to become a better person, I think I need to look at my interactions with others and my response to others.  I believe each person on earth has the capacity to reach out to someone else.  Each person can touch another person’s life and can even have a profound effect in that person’s life.  As I’ve thought about my life and what I am doing I realize the happiest moments were when what I did brought joy and happiness to another person.   Learning to give selflessly is a difficult thing to do in our present society.  We are a “me” society and have come to believe our greatest happiness comes through serving ourselves before others and rewarding ourselves instead of sharing our rewards.

Today I take stock in where I am and where I want to be tomorrow.  More importantly, who I am today and who I want to be tomorrow.  God provides us with wonderful guides in how to live a truly happy life.  Believe it or not, it isn’t through serving ourselves; it is through serving God through serving others.   When we stop living for the world, for all we can accomplish in a day and start living a God centered life, focused on serving one another, true happiness overflows throughout our lives.  I don’t think that means we won’t have a bad day or endure hardships.   I believe it means because of all of the blessings we share, we can get through the times of difficulty, no longer needed to ask why.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

As I went about my day I started to think about the type of people who do this.  How does one take something from someone they don’t even know?  How can you enjoy anything that was received through a deceptive manner?  The more I thought about it the more upset I became.  Two of the large purchases were at a grocery store.  They spent more with one swipe than I do all month at the grocery store.  Then they went back and shopped some more.  The total sum was almost three times what our family of four (with two teenagers) and a Newf and two cats use a month.  As a matter of fact, I hadn’t even had the chance to go grocery shopping yet.

I struggled with my feelings of anger.  I struggled to see how someone could do this to another person.  Especially a person they don’t know or know their situation.  We were lucky.  None of us had to do without because of it but what about those who do?  Then I started to think about the person who did this, what was their situation?  What lead them down this path?  Did they know God?

As I went through my varied emotions the one thing that I did not question was the fact that I knew God would get us through this and take care of us.  God is always present, even in times like these.  I know it is hard to accept when something happens to you that you don’t feel you deserve.  We didn’t deserve this to happen but it did.  That doesn’t give me permission to be angry or to blame God.  What it does do is give me an opportunity to have faith in God and know from the darkness there is light.  God is good that way.  He never abandons us.  There may be times when we wonder where God is or ask how he let something happen.  The answer lays in the fact that God gave us free will.  Each human is responsible for his or her choices.  As humans we should care enough about our fellow man not to mistreat them.  I believe this is part of the reason Jesus came to walk among us.  He came to teach us how to love one another.  He wanted us to forgive one another and to lift one another up.  He showed us the way yet he still allows us to choose the path we go down.   I can’t make everyone do what is right but I can ensure that I do what is right.  I choose to follow the path Jesus has laid before us.  Yes, life will still happen but at least God will be with me.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

Soon after the moving van departed, we had some visitors.  A litter of grey kittens and two larger grey cats started hanging around.  My daughter took to one of the kittens.  He looked thirsty so she gave him a drink.  He looked hungry so she fed him.  I think you know where this is going.  One of the older cats was shy and distant.  He never approached us, just sat at the far corner of the house.  Every once in a while we would catch him off guard eating or drinking from the kittens bowls.  However, once he discovered us, he ran.  Within time, these two were the only ones left of about seven.

This cycle of feeding and sheltering went on for about a year.  The kitten soon grew into a young adult male cat.   I took him to get shots and neutered.  Over the year I tried to get the older cat to come near.  Once in a while if I were very still he would come to the porch and check me out.  I seldom got to touch him though.

One morning I went out to find that he was badly injured.  His front leg was swollen and he could barely walk.  For this first time I was able to pick him up with ease.  I took him to the vet to find out he had been declawed and neutered.  Yet, he was abandoned.  Left outside to fend for himself and to defend himself.  I had to keep the cat kenneled for two weeks and give him antibiotics twice a day.  What I learned in that time was he was very afraid of males, particularly males in hats.  I also learned that although it was apparent that he had been badly abused, at one time in his life he had been deeply loved.  After the two weeks of living in my Newfoundland’s kennel, he decided this was home.  He wasn’t out getting beat up; he was getting two meals a day, fresh water and a good rub every day.   He definitely decided this was the life.

Fast forward a couple of years…we still have both cats.  The older cat has to have eye surgery.  He went blind in his eye and the vet believes it is from an old injury.  While I was trying to justify getting this eye surgery to my husband I realized how every decision we make affects so many people.  I am sure the family that left all of those cats behind hasn’t really thought of who took care of their cats or even if those cats survived.  What they do know is that the cats aren’t their problem anymore.   Their problem became a gift to me.

I’ve never really been a cat person before this.  However, these cats have taught me compassion and that even though taking care of them wasn’t my responsibility it was the right thing to do.   My daughter feed them, gave them water and shelter.   She felt it was the right thing to do as well.

The older cat didn’t asked to be cared for, abused and then abandoned.  He certainly didn’t ask to go blind and to suffer unbearable pain.  I didn’t ask for a cat or cats.  My husband certainly didn’t ask for them.  Yet, here we are…owners of two permanent resident strays.

When I pick up the blind cat and he rubs up against me, I know we did the right thing.  We took what someone discarded and we placed value on their lives.  Animal lives, yet none the less, lives.  I believe all life is a gift from God; a blessing.   Monday he will have surgery to have his eye removed.  He will then be free of pain and once again know the safety of my Newf’s kennel as he recovers.  Sometimes maintaining our beliefs and values come with a price but all life truly is priceless.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

My Memoma would take us to visit relatives and we would attend services with them.  No matter what church we went to the welcome was the same.  I know, some of you may be thinking “they were trying to save your soul.”  Yes, that is probably true.  Yet, what I think is wonderful is that no matter who you were they made sure you knew you were welcomed.

Where am I going with this?  Yes, I am Catholic today but that same mentality sticks with me.  I try my best to ensure new parishioners feel welcomed.  I want them to know there is a place for them in our parish and that if they volunteer I will definitely put them to use.  There is nothing worse than being new to an area, finding the only Catholic Church around, only to discover not a single person takes a moment to say hello or introduce him or herself.

Having moved all over the world as a child with military parents and as a military spouse, I’m sad to say I know that feeling.   One parish we went offered three weekend services.  This parish had a beautiful, modern church.  It had stained glass windows, was spread out and was perfect.  Well, except it lacked a vital part a parish should offer– an atmosphere of hospitality.

We attended this church for seven months without a single person greeting us or offering an introduction.  Since everyone in our family had been extremely active in all of our other parishes it was only natural to sign up for several ministries.  Combine all of our ministries and we’ve done just about everything except be the priest.

We registered the first weekend we were there.  After volunteering I waited patiently to hear from the church.  A week went by, then another.   Finally I received some correspondence from the parish…no, not a welcome letter, tithing envelopes.  I didn’t like that too much because I have always felt a welcome and introductions come before money requests.  I let it go and still waited to hear from someone.

One Sunday we had a ministry Sunday where everyone was handed out forms to volunteer for the various ministries.  A plea was made for volunteers.  My family filled them out.  They were seeking individuals to serve in every capacity.  Perfect.  I volunteered to serve on the parish council and school board as I have been the president, secretary and treasurer of different parish councils and president of the Catholic Women of the Chapel.

The next week it was time to vote on the parish council and school board.  We were handed a sheet with five people on it.  Each person listed had a picture and a little bio.  I just about went through the roof.  Why did I volunteer?  I hadn’t even been contacted to see if I had the qualifications required to serve in these capacities, much less did I find my name listed among those who volunteered.  Needless to say I wondered what the point of last weeks’ volunteer sheet and profession that volunteers were needed was for.  I didn’t vote for anyone, instead I put a note that said, “If you are going to ask for volunteers to serve, you should at least contact them.”

Soon after that I went to our Catholic school PTA meeting.  Again it was election time.  Four individuals and the president stood up.  The president introduced the individuals and voted them in.  There wasn’t any competition, or any nominations.  They were voted in with the announcement that the new vice president would serve as the president the following year.  I guess I had a stupefied look upon my face because the lady next to me whispered, “It isn’t a democracy here, you’re either in or you aren’t.”  Were we in high school or what?  I didn’t take any of this at all.

Finally, after being there for six months without a word from the church or ministry leaders (other than a new set of tithing envelopes) I went in to see the priest.  You guessed it.  One of the first questions he asked me was if we volunteered for any ministries.  I told him yes, that I was waiting to hear from the church.  And that was the end of it.

I walked away from that church feeling like the only good I was to them was the money I donated to pay for their 1.5 billion dollar church.  A church that was full of people who were as cold and unwelcoming as the beautiful marble that lay upon the floor.   I felt they were a church that asked for volunteers with no intent of utilizing their talents.

The last weekend I was there I laughed to myself as I read the parish bulletin.  It was a long speech about giving of your time and talent.  I’m still at a loss for words.  It doesn’t do any good to talk the talk but not walk the walk.

As a DRE and parish coordinator, even when I was a ministry leader, I put forth a great deal of effort to try to ensure no one ever feels that way at our parish.  I know it hurts when you offer everything you have to your church because you love God and your Catholic faith, only to find the only thing they really want from you is in your wallet.   I know paying for the church is important but what good is a big, beautiful building that lacks God’s true presence among its leaders and followers?

I’m sad to say as a Catholic I understand the bad rap we get.  I’ve had newcomers to our Catholic faith or those inquiring state they felt rejected before they were even Catholic.  They felt this because they’ve sat in the pew for weeks and months without anyone noticing they were new.  Newcomers to our faith often comment on feeling they have to jump through hoops to get in.  My hope is that we can learn a little lesson from our Baptist brothers and sisters in Christ.

I never let go of the welcoming feeling I had as a child entering an unfamiliar Baptist church and even as an adult returning home…it was a warm feeling of God’s presence.  God wants us to welcome others.  God wants our mission to be to save others and to bring them to Christ.  Jesus shared God’s word with others in many different places.   I believe you can find God in a big, beautiful building but it begins with the people not the bank note.

Please take the time to welcome others to your parish and when someone volunteers, accept their offer.  You never know what wonderful gifts they long to share.  There is nothing worse than feeling rejected in God’s house.  I believe we all know that is not what Jesus would want.  Jesus gathered those around him that all others left to the way side.

One Sunday we were in Alaska on vacation.  As we were preparing to take our seats the priest came up to us and greeted us.  He asked where we were from.  We joked about looking like tourists and he said something I will never forget.  Something that says the message best and applies to us all, “Every good shepherd knows his flock.”


Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

This move would mean my husband would remain here while my two teenagers and I move.  I try to justify the separation by the fact that my husband’s job is suppose to relocate at an unknown location at an unknown time between now and two years from now.  (A reason our horses are still where they are.)

I struggle with this decision because I love my job.  Not only do I love it but I feel called to it.  I love the people I work with and the children.  I see the fruit of my hard work in every child’s smile as they receive Communion for the first time and in every young adult that is blessed with Confirmation.  I love to be a part of the lives of adults as they journey through the Rite of Christian Initiation.  I see God present in each of their glowing faces.  To be a part of something like this is priceless.  I find meaning and purpose in what I am doing.  I am filled with God’s love and the hope for future generations of Catholics.

I know my job as the director of religious education at a small parish, for small wages doesn’t seem very important in the scheme of things.  Yet, to me it is a job where I know what I am doing touches the lives of so many.  Even if there was only one person that I shared our faith with that would be enough.  Our faith would be carried on through that person.  Over their lifetime an uncountable amount of people’s lives would be touched.  It all begins with one person sharing their love and faith.  It is a blessing that keeps giving.

All of these things I feel deep in my heart.  Even though I feel these feelings I question if continuing with this job is God’s will or my own?  What is my motivation?

I struggle with this because I want to go back for my job and to be with my horses but I ask myself if what I feel is God’s calling or me trying to justify following my hearts desires.  We lived in the area where my job is for quite some time.  We developed lifelong friendships and every member of my family was a part of our parish there.  I commute back quite often.  The first time I went back I was worried that I would feel out of place.  Nothing like going back to something to find everyone and thing has changed, life has moved on without you.  To my great surprise it felt like I had never left.  When I went in to Mass and sat in the very same pew I had for years and was greeted by my very same friends, I felt at home.  My heart is not just in my job but in every person who is a part of that community.

I know being in a position to share God with others is my calling in life.   What I don’t know is if returning is God’s will or my own.


Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

Hosea was married to a woman who was repeatedly unfaithful to him.  During this time the Law would have allowed Hosea to discard his wife and have her stoned to death for her unfaithfulness.  However, Hosea had hope that she would one day return to love and faithfulness.

Hosea thought about the meaning of his life and the relationship God and Israel had.  God could easily destroy those who did not follow his Laws.  However, God waited with patience and love for his people to return to him.  In this contemplation Hosea realized the similarities in his own life and with God and Israel’s.  In this Hosea came to understand that in Covenant Love he was called to remain hopeful that his wife would one day return his love and fidelity; just as God patiently waited for his people to return to him in love and fidelity.

I was touched deeply by Hosea’s discovery and dedication.  Hosea set aside feelings that most of us would have.  Instead he looked to God and God’s example.  I believe he also realized that Covenant Love called him to a greater understanding of love in a marriage.  Hosea chose to hear God and to remain faithful to Covenant Love regardless if his wife was.  He held on to the belief that one day his wife would come to realize what she was doing was wrong and would be the faithful wife Hosea patiently waited for.  Hosea came to realize that God could not simply stop loving us even though we are unfaithful to him.  And Hosea could not stop loving his wife because she was unfaithful to him.  Hosea knew God wanted him to deliver two messages to the people:  To repent and to have hope.  I believe Hosea showed us how to hold on to hope and to believe in God’s word.

Covenant Love calls us to remain faithful to God and to remain hopeful in God regardless of the situation.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

As I thought about Covenants marriage came to mind.  Yes, we make a “Covenant” to our spouses when we get married.   What some may not realize is that we also make a “Covenant” with God.  When we get married in the church we are making a promise shared between our spouse, God and us.

With these thoughts I realized that if I were able to keep in mind the fact that I didn’t just make a promise to my husband but I also made a promise to God, I would treat the Sacrament of marriage with greater respect.  There are times I behave poorly, say things I would say to God.   There are times when I expect more of my husband than perhaps I should.  If he forgets something, I am not as easy on him as I am those outside of our family.  I know we are all human but when we keep God central in our lives, we seem to treat others with the respect and kindness they deserve.

I believe this promise we share is why we call marriage a Sacrament.  It truly is a Sacrament that should be cherished and treated with the utmost respect.  When I keep God as my focus in life, I am less likely to behave in mannerisms that are not God-like.

Recalling that God shares a part in my marriage promise helps me to remain true to the Sacrament of marriage.  I was recently talking to a friend about marriage.  He shared with me his perspective on marriage.  He said that the husband and the wife are not what are most important in the Sacrament of marriage, it is the promise we make to God.  I thought about what he had to say.  I found merit in his words.  And the bottom line is the promise we made to God.  It is easy to forget that marriage isn’t just between two people but between a man, a woman and God.

Throughout history God has provided us with many great examples of upholding Covenants.  He has shown us the importance of keeping our promises.  Our marriage Covenant deserves the same effort we give to all of the other commitments in life that are truly less important.  By recalling that God is a part of our marriage Covenant we can share a beautiful relationship with God and our spouse by keeping our marriage Covenant.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

To me, summer vacation is one of God’s greatest gifts.  Not because I am free to do as I please or just bum around the beach all day, no it is something more.  It’s having my children home.

Being a mother has to be the greatest gift God can bless one with.  While I know raising children has its ups and downs the ups outweigh the downs on any given day.   There is nothing more wonderful than holding your baby for the first time, watching them go off to school the first day, getting their first home run or going to their first dance.  Each step in their lives is a beautiful gift.

Every time I look into their eyes I see their entire lives flash before my eyes.  I see their first coos, their first mamas and their first steps.  I am full of love and joy whenever I think of my children.  Yes, one is grown and two are well on their way but it doesn’t matter how old they get, they are still my children.

While many parents are pulling their hair out by the end of the first week of summer, I am already dreading the first day of school.  Summer passes by way too quick for me.  The day school starts is a bitter sweet day for me.  Bitter because the house is so quiet and I miss my children, sweet because my children are growing up and taking another step towards their future.  I’ll be the first to admit no matter how old they are, I cry on their first day of school.  Now instead of crying as I see them off to school I wait until the house is empty and take a few minutes to mourn; all the while eagerly waiting their return to hear all about their day.

Summer vacation means long days spent with my children getting to know them better.  We share thoughts and ideas, great books and games.  We watch movies, go swimming and just relax.  Each moment I share with my children is one more moment I store away in the treasure box of my heart.  So welcome summer vacation…go slow this year!

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

While I sat there I became even more annoyed with the fact that someone took my seat and I didn’t have the view I liked.  Stewing over that I looked up to see Jesus suspended mid air on the cross.  This was definitely a different view than I had from my regular seat.

I have never had this perspective before.  From where I normally sat it was impossible to see the details I now saw.  As I sat there I became absorbed in my new perspective and far less annoyed.

I studied the details of Jesus on the cross.  I never realized just how detailed his body was.  The look upon his face—the agony and sorrow was expressed with so much emotion.   His flesh hanging from his skin appeared real.  I could even see the striations in his muscles.

I studied Jesus intently throughout mass.  By the time the hour had passed the annoyance over my seat had vanished…it was the furthest thing from my mind.

It was replaced with the gift of perspective.  Life is all about perspective.   Jesus taught me that sometimes in order to see things better I need to let go and get a little closer to God.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

It was just before Christmas, 2007 when my mother-in-law was hospitalized for acute pancreaitus and had to have gall bladder surgery.  The surgery didn’t go as planned and they were unable to remove the breathing tube after surgery.  She was unresponsive, unable to breath on her own, and was on a respirator.  The second day after surgery she went into cardiac arrest.  Luckily, they were able to revive her.  At this point, the outlook wasn’t good.  We were advised to begin preparations for a funeral.  This was all happening as Christmas fast approached.  A couple of days later, she was flown to the cardiac intensive care unit at a local hospital for immediate quadruple by-pass surgery.

What I found most touching was my husband’s dedication and devotion to his mother.  Regardless of all he and our family endured trying to ensure her needs had been met, he was full of compassion and concern.  As I sat and watched him care for her, I was barely able to comprehend this.  They did not have an exceptionally good relationship up to this point.  As a matter of fact, although she had lived with us for almost two years prior to our current location, there was very little evidence of love in their relationship.  It was more a business venture, where my husband ensured all of her needs were met and she relied solely on him to do so.  Yet, I saw compassion for his mother, for life.  In the midst of this, we were going back and forth to the hospital (sometimes several times a day), preparing for Christmas (I hadn’t yet bought gifts, much less sent any), dealing with her financial issues, apartment, and so on while trying to remain good parents to our children.  Luckily, school was out.

An amazing thing that happened during this time:  Our children began to take responsibility for caring for our pets, cleaning the house and even preparing meals.  I was so touched one evening when we were on our way home from the hospital after a long, trying day, when our daughter called and said not to worry about dinner, she’d already made it.  Our children showed us a compassion and love I am proud to have witnessed.  This struggle required all of us to stretch and grow.  During this time of difficulty God called each of us to a new level.  What we thought we were incapable of, He enabled us to do.

This experience left me in awe of God because I know without Him my family would not have made it through that winter.

Our family was faced with doing what is right in spite of doing what our “feelings” were.  Sometimes you are asked to do what you have firmly said you would never do.  Even when we think we don’t have the ability to do as God requests, we are filled with His presence and His love.  He allows us to fulfill His will, not our own. For through God, all things are possible.

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer

Every now and then, I find that God reveals His wisdom to me and calls me to His service when I’m just sitting there; content in my life.

One such day during daily mass, our priest found himself in need of a Eucharistic minister.  However, none of us were Eucharistic ministers.  As providence would have it, I was sitting directly in front of him.  He motioned for me to come up.  I think part of him was still back in the desert, where he recently returned from deployment, while the rest of him was in California because he softly whispered, “combat installation.”

I felt a little nervous and some anxiety over the whole thing.  The priest didn’t seem to notice, or perhaps he did notice, but kept on going.  Either way, I followed suit.  I was given the cup and followed him to present the Blood and Body of Christ to our fellow parishioners.

None of the mishaps that I managed to envision within the few minutes from my seat to the altar became reality.  I didn’t fall and spill the Blood of Christ every where.  I didn’t drop the cup when trying to retrieve it from someone.

Instead, something wonderful happened. As I offered the Blood of Christ, I finally got what it was all about.  God showed me the importance of sharing the Body and Blood of Christ with all I could.  He showed me the importance of every member of the church.  Most importantly, He shared with me the beauty and honor of being the catalyst in sharing His precious Blood.

My eyes were also opened to something I failed to notice before:  The priest intentionally breaks a small triangular piece of the Body of Christ and puts it into his chalice.  It can be imperceptible to our eyes if we are not specifically looking for it. The priest breaks off a small piece of the Eucharistic bread and drops it into the chalice that contains the Precious Blood of Jesus while he silently prays. This is called the co-mingling of the bread and wine. It is a small act, but rich in symbolism.

First, it symbolizes the Resurrection of our Lord. At the consecration our Lord came to the bread and wine separately – this is my Body, this is my Blood; symbolic of His death on the cross. Now the two are joined.

Second, it symbolizes the unity of the Church. In early Church a piece of the Eucharist from the Pope’s Mass was broken off and taken to other churches and mingled with their Eucharistic species to signify that they were all one Body of Christ. This piece was called the fermentum, a Latin word that means leaven.

Third, in some parts of the Church it became the custom to retain this broken Eucharistic bread soaked in the Precious Blood for the Communion to the sick and dying. Obviously, given this condition it would be easier for someone having difficulty in swallowing to partake in the Eucharist.

What an honor I felt (and still feel) as I realized the true significance of what I am permitted to participate in.  I invite each of you to consider sharing this beautiful gift of not only receiving the Blood and Body of Christ, but in sharing it with others.

I never planned on becoming a Eucharistic minister. Yet for me it is another reminder that, as always, “Father knows best.”

Copyright 2010 Lorrie Lane Dyer