Last night, I got to tell my story for the umpteenth time. It’s funny, I don’t get tired of repeating. Not just because I get to talk about myself – finding happiness and fulfillment is what’s most important to everyone.

Two fellow seminarians and I went to dinner with a wonderful couple from Idaho. Before the appetizers reached the table, Br. James was well along in recounting his vocation story, and Br. Andrew didn’t stop until we had finished our pasta. His was already cold.

Then it was my turn! Just that morning, I was thinking about what a vocation really is. But wait a second, let’s back up a bit…

What’s World Day of Prayer for Vocations?
 It’s a special day set aside by the pope to pray for vocations to the priesthood, like Christ’s asks in the Gospel but also for all vocations in general. Here are some great quotes from Benedict:

[L]ove is limitless and precedes us, sustains us and calls us along the path of life, a love rooted in an absolutely free gift of God. Speaking particularly of the ministerial priesthood, my predecessor, Blessed John Paul II, stated that “every ministerial action – while it leads to loving and serving the Church – provides an incentive to grow in ever greater love and service of Jesus Christ the head, shepherd and spouse of the Church, a love which is always a response to the free and unsolicited love of God in Christ”.

Every specific vocation is in fact born of the initiative of God; it is a gift of the Love of God! He is the One who takes the “first step”, and not because he has found something good in us, but because of the presence of his own love “poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit” (Rom 5:5).

We need to open our lives to this love. It is to the perfection of the Father’s love (cf. Mt 5:48) that Jesus Christ calls us every day! The high standard of the Christian life consists in loving “as” God loves; with a love that is shown in the total, faithful and fruitful gift of self.

What do we mean by vocation?

We were all made to leave our mark. We’re called to be happy. We’re called to know God and help others. So what’s your story? Here are a couple you will enjoy. Br. Andrew’s is actually one of them.

What’s my vocation?

Back to my thoughts at dinner last night. That morning, I read the Gospel of the Good Shepherd. I found the vocation had three important parts.

1. The sheep know his voice.

If we want to respond to any vocation, we have to be able to hear the call. Silence is a must in today’s clamor. Here are some thoughts on our need for silence: Silence: iNoise and the Battle for our Soul.

2. He call’s us by name.

We each have a unique vocation, and we’ve got to listen carefully to figure it out. I reflected on that a couple weeks ago: What to do with our lives.

3. He leads us out.

It’s a call that demands we leave the comfort zone of the sheepfold, that we go out into the world fighting for Christ and spreading his love to those around us. So how do we really love? What is love? Two easy steps.

What’s your story? Comment or email me. Share the post, and I pray that you figure out God’s plan for your happiness and fulfillment – vocation.

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

31 churches, 11 hours, 1 city. Our first anual Churchathon was a mix of prayer, fun and getting lost in Rome. Our only mission: pray for the intentions that so many of our friends and family members asked of us. Heres the summary video to give thanks to them, to you and to Him for this awesome opportunity to serve. Enjoy!

31 iglesias, 11 horas, 1 ciudad. Nuestro primer “Churchathon” fue una mezcla de oración, fraternidad y perderse en Roma. Nuestra única misión: rezar por todas las intenciones que nos llegaron de nuestros familiares y amigos. Aquí está el vídeo que lo resume todo. Está hecho para darle gracias a todos y sobre todo a Él que lo hizo posible. ¡Qué disfruten!

Video Link

One of these surprises has been the story of Annie Asmussen. A young woman giving her life full-time  to God and others. I got the chance to ask her a couple of questions, and here are the answers. You can find out more on her blog: Way of Love.

“So I am a missionary to love the empty, unhappy, and falsely happy. I’ve seen the most hardened hearts find peace, freedom and joy in Jesus.”

Q: Why did you go on missions? Start your blog? 

Annie: I am a missionary simply because I responded to the depths of what my heart wanted… to love. Walking around seeing all the unhappy people, I couldn’t just continue living my life happily in Jesus as if I didn’t acknowledge their pain. Offering the love of Jesus to people is so simple yet often overlooked. I used to think, “I don’t want to impose my beliefs on others.” But, if people were made by God and made to long for God then they cannot be fully alive unless they have Jesus’ love to bring them joy. Then no matter what others might tell you or think they need… the depths of their being wants Jesus. So I am a missionary to love the empty, unhappy, and falsely happy. I’ve seen the most hardened hearts find peace, freedom and joy in Jesus. Knowing that what Jesus brings is Life to the fullest… no matter what persecution I face, I don’t have any reason not to preach the gospel of truth.I started my blog because my step dad asked me to and said he would pray a rosary for every post. So at first I posted every day… just to get him to pray Now I can see the genius of his idea. Whenever faith is shared… it blesses people so I’ll continue blogging because I can see the ripple effect faith has on others.

Q: What is the best thing that ever happened to you? 

Annie: The best thing that’s ever happened to me is receiving the body, blood, soul and divinity of Jesus in the Eucharist! Awesome that as Catholics we get to receive Our Savior, King… the source and summit of our faith in it’s fullness every mass. I am blessed because the best thing that’s ever happened to me, continues to happen to me every mass. I’ll always have something to hope in while on earth.

Q: Who is the person you most admire and why? 

Annie: John Paul II!! Getting to see JPII when I was in High School had a large impact on me. His words infused with scripture continue to pierce my heart and inspire me to live my faith today.

Q: What event in your life has most affected you? 

Annie: If I had to choose one event that had the most impact on the rest of my life I would say my Baptism. Even though I was baptized as an infant and don’t remember it… the fact that I am a Catholic gives my entire life purpose and meaning. What I do on the weekends, what I focus my life on was determined in that moment when I was set apart and called for something greater in my baptism.

Q: What is the most significant spiritual experience that you have had? 

Annie: The most significant experience that I’ve had was the first time I knew God was real in my heart at age 15 at a Steubenville Conference in San Diego, CA. Kneeling in adoration, I cried, let go of everything. Looking at Jesus in the Eucharist, a beautiful peace overwhelmed me and I knew God was real. The peace turned into joy that I’ve only been able to find in Jesus since. I tried to fill my life with drinking, relationships, affection… but I always knew in the back of my mind that if I wanted joy I needed Jesus because I was never able to forget that moment when I knew God was real.

Q: In a sentence, what would your advice be to young people to day? 

Annie: Seek the Lord with all that you are since only He can satisfy your desire for love, peace, joy and hope…. He is everything you are searching for.

What would you say? Have you found your mission? Check out, What to do with our lives?

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

Back to Tebow, just for a moment. Tebowing on the sidelines and preaching in front of the cameras, some seem to think every ball to leave his hand is divinely guided – nothing short of a miracle.

STOP! We need a brick wall to stop our mental freight train.

Our world is full of frenzy, distraction, and gratification. Every day more Tweets, IM’s, texts, FaceBooks (don’t know if that works in the plural), and calls flood into our heads.

Silence! “Why?” you ask.

The more information, the less know. The more “Friends” and “Followers”, the more lonely we become. The more we hear, the less we listen. Sometimes we’re doing a thousand things but getting nowhere. Our daily life is full of activity, but it’s not fulfilling.

How can we be happy, fulfilled, and successful? We have to go deep with ourselves and with God. How do we go deep? Start creating silence by stopping life with a brick wall.

“Easy for him to say,” you think, “he lives in a seminary.” But the clerical collar doesn’t double as a set of earplugs.

***

Class is over. I have a message to send and a call to make before dashing off to give a tour at St. Peter’s Basilica. Walking out the door, I press the phone to my ear with one hand and button my overcoat with the other. On the train. Off the train. Into St. Peter’s Square.

The brick wall to stop the thought freight train comes three hours and a few thousand words later! The large steel gate slowly slides open, and back at the seminary, I step into a different world. Screeching tires, horns, sirens, and the rumble of traffic are all left behind.

***

Life at a desk is no less chaotic. I rush to the office hoping to finish a pending article. Ring… The phone yanks my attention away. I have less than five minutes.

Knock, knock – someone is at the door. Two minutes left, but I’m still in the middle of the conversation. A loud buzz catches us both by surprise – a bell to tell us it’s time for the rosary.

The brick wall stops me, my email, and my conversation. It’s time to pray with my fellow seminarians.

***

Almost any visitor to the seminary comments, “It’s so peaceful, so silent.” The cause of the sensation is hard to nail down, but it’s there.

The dictionary defines silence as the “forbearance from speech or noise”. I disagree. Otherwise eight hours of sleep would be plenty of silence for anyone.

Silence is the “forbearance of speech or noise” to be alone with God and get to know ourselves and him better.

If we paid as much attention to God and ourselves in silence as we do to FaceBook, Twitter, and the phone, we’d be men and saints already!

That’s what I love about the seminary. Silence reigns – not just an absence of external noise but rather an internal attitude that sustains everything I do. There is a deep attentiveness to the needs of others and to the will of God that determines everything else. It’s not the total absence of activity, but having enough brick walls to stop and remind me what’s important

I can hear it again. “You’re in the seminary. What about me?” There are many ways to live silence without joining the seminary. Here are four practical tips:

1. Answer the question.

Do you really want to live silence? You have to feel the need to take a step back and find some real answers. Not everything worth hearing will come from an MP3 player or is on the internet.

The answers to the deepest questions of your life are to be found in silence. What will make you happy? What is your vocation? Who is God?

Make a commitment to live silence.

2. Use earbuds sparingly.

Music and external noise is fine in controlled doses. But if your head is full of the latest release, you can barely hear yourself let alone God.

If you feel a compulsive urge to stick them in as soon as you hang up the phone or walk out the door, why not limit music to specific times of day? Think, reflect, and pray in the other times of silence.

3. Come up for air.

Every so often, we need to take a silent step back from everything. Work, study, food, sleep, workouts – life accelerates, but we need to stop the freight train of our mind every so often.

After class, after lunch, or 10 minutes before you go to bed, shut the laptop. Silence the phone. Close the door. Reflect and pray.

4. Brick walls, not traffic lights.

You might be asking – why a brick wall? Wouldn’t a traffic light do? If your mind is going 80 mph, a red light is only going to make you feel guilty as you speed through.

So you need to be abrupt and demanding – put up some brick walls. It’s not about just turning the volume down a little, you need daily silence and personal prayer.
As we start Lent on Ash Wednesday, it’s a great opportunity to look at Jesus. After St. John baptized him in the Jordan, he went into the desert. If God lived 40 days of silent reflection, 24 hours a day, we can handle five minutes.

As Mother Theresa said:

The fruit of silence is prayer.
The fruit of prayer is faith.
The fruit of faith is love.
The fruit of love is service.
The fruit of service is peace.

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

This time, I’ll keep this short – three questions on prayer and three answers. (1) It’s not that easy, any suggestions? (2) Okay, I’m kneeling (sitting or standing for that matter), now what? And (3) Where can I read more about this?

It’s not that easy, any suggestions?

Preparation is huge. If we simply plop down on a chair and expect to enter into mystical communion with God, we better think again.

It’s just like any serious conversation. we have to thinks things out ahead of time. What do we want to talk about? What are the main points? Is there some specific question that we have? It’s not about creating a strait-jacket for our prayer, but we have to put time and effort into it. Then obviously we open ourselves to God’s inspiration and initiative.

Place is important. Catholic Christian prayer involves the whole person, body and soul. So where you pray is important. Pilgrimages are special spots for prayer, but perhaps the best spot is with the Eucharist.

It can also help to have a personal spot set aside exclusively for prayer. We might not have a room to spare in the dorm, but at least we can have a chair and an image of Christ or something to designate sacred time and space.

Silence is crucial. But we’ll leave this for next week.

Okay, I’m kneeling, now what?

Start strong in Him

We’re in God’s presence. He’s there whether we recognize him or not. Even if we’re checked out, he’s wants to talk. Preparation is a must, but at the end of the day, HE’s the important one.

He’s our Creator, Redeemer, and constant companion, and beg his love and mercy. Keep it real. Many saints recommend renewing our faith, hope, and love – they allow us to talk to Christ. Ask him for the grace and the strength to stay focused and listen. Ask Mary and St. Philomena (or whoever your favorite saint is – she was St. John Vianney’s) to help.

Dive in

Then we just start talking. There are a variety of different “methods” than can help. But they are just that – possible methods. Here are the basics of two common methods to get you started – lectio divina and the Ignatian method of meditation.

Lectio divina just means a prayerful reading of scripture and applying it to our lives. There are lots of different varieties, but it basically consists in a five step process.

1. Reading and listening. We need to start out with a slow attentive reading of God’s word, listening in our hearts. What’s going on? Why? We read it over a number of times until some part or word jumps out

2. Meditation. Just like Mary, we take what jumps to our attention and “ponder these things in our heart”. We don’t need a lot of material, but “what does Christ say to ME”?

3. Prayer. This is the actual dialogue with Christ. We’ve heard something in the Word of Scripture. Jesus extends an invitation to us, and we respond to what he is asking. We speak personally about our lives, what he wants from us. It’s not abstract – what did Christ do, and what does he call us to?

4. Contemplation. Then it helps to stop talking and just be with Christ. It can let him get a word in edgewise, and other times we simply enjoy his presence.

5. Action. Prayer should transform our lives. What does Christ want us to do? How can we continue to respond to his invitation in our daily lives? We make a concrete commitment – realistic and challenging – that will stay with us for the day.

Ignatian meditation is based on what St. Ignatius of Loyola is writes in his spiritual exercises. These are the basic steps.

1. Preparation. We already talked about Starting Strong – putting ourselves in God’s presence and renewing our faith, hope, and love.

2. Composition of place. Just like the physical place is important, so is the spiritual one. It helps a lot to use our imagination to recreate the scene. We can see the apostles, hear them talking, feel the grass beneath their feet, smell the fresh sea breeze. It’s not make believe, but realizing that the scene and event is even more real than our imagination.

3. Petition. We ask God for some specific grace. What is the subject of our conversation going to be? This will be the refrain throughout the whole prayer. Repeating it really helps when we are distracted.

4. Material and points. We can base the body of the meditation on a biblical passage, a text from a good spiritual book, traditional prayers, a situation in our life, and so on. We center our reflection on a couple aspects that will help us to better understand and dialogue with Christ about the grace we need.

5. Colloquies. Throughout the main part of the meditation, we should take moments to talk heart-to-heart with Christ, telling him what we think and asking for help.

6. Resolution. After asking Christ for the grace, reflecting, and listening to what he says to us, what are we going to do? What specific action will bring us closer to him?

Finish stronger

In both of the methods, there is an action or resolution. Prayer can’t just be five minutes in the morning. It has to be something that affects everything we do, and this commitment is what will unite our prayer with our life. So our prayer really extends throughout the day and into the next.

Where can I read more about this?

Some great books:

Time for God by Jacques Philippe. This is my favorite.

Prayer for Beginners by Peter Kreeft.

Fire Within by Fr. Thomas Dubay, S.M.

Some great websites:

Daily readings to meditate on.

Meditations for every day.

Lots of great prayers.

I hope to update this with more books and site. Please comment to this post with your favorites, suggestions, and experience.

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

We’re constantly communicating with people. We prove that man is a social animal with the thousand different gadgets to talk and chat. We have computers, FaceBook, SKYPE, instant messengers, cell phones, IPads, and just about anything else possible to stay in touch.

As Pope Benedict XVI recently said, “We can “ruminate” in many ways; for instance, by taking a short passage of sacred Scripture, especially the Gospels, the Acts of the Apostles, the Apostle’s Letters, or a page from a spiritual author we are drawn to and which makes the reality of God in our today more present, perhaps taking advice from a confessor or spiritual director; by reading and reflecting on what we’ve just read, pausing to consider it, seeking to understand it, to understand what it says to me, what it says today — to open our soul to all that the Lord wants to say to us and teach us.” (August 17, 2001)

Phil had it made. He was 18 and playing for Manchester United, one of the most respected football (soccer, for us Americans) teams in Europe. He had already played on their youth team for a couple of years. What more could a guy want?

But vying for midfield with David Beckham, Paul Scholes, and losing out on playing time wasn’t exactly a glorious career. He moved to a much smaller club in hope of a little time on the field. But things didn’t get better. Injury struck, more than once. As he moved from team to team, he wasn’t getting playing time or recognition. What was he to do with his life?

All of us ask this question at least once in our lives. We want to do something worthwhile, make a difference, leave a mark on the world. There are over six billion people on the face of the earth – how can we possibly stand out, really accomplish something with our lives.

The instant gratification that the media constantly pump at us – sex, drink, drugs, adrenaline – it only satisfies for a fleeting instant, and we’re most often left worse off. What’s our mission? Where is our real adventure?

Obviously we’re all capable of doing many things, and even well. You might make a great farmer, businessman, and doctor. But there is certainly a long-term plan for our lives that ensures our happiness, or in other words someone made us with a certain mission in mind. How to find out?

Unfortunately when we’re born, we don’t come with an instruction manual. We are projects constantly under construction. One of our jobs is just that, to figure out and undertake OUR vocation.

It will take each of a lifetime to figure this out for ourselves. But some elements are necessary for all – married, single, or consecrated; soldier, doctor, priest, or whatever else.

1. Meaning.

What is our life all about? We have to answer this question for ourselves. There is no book, Life for Dummies (at least not that works). We have to think, reflect, and find the truth.

This kind of goes back a little bit to what I mentioned about truehappiness. We were created to be happy and fulfilled. Someone gave us the gift of life and freedom, and he calls us to cooperate on the path of our lives.

The world needs heroes and saints not just nice guys. Do we want to make a difference? Are we willing to put in the effort?

2. Prayer.

If we want to follow the plan, we’ve got to talk to the guy who made it, God! It’s through prayer that we get to know who he is, who we are, and what he calls us to.

Unlike going to the fortune-teller or the palm-reader, we’re going to have to do this for our whole life. The plan of our lives isn’t a Google map route that comes with all the detailed instructions, street-view, and everything. It’s something that will continue to unfold and develop in ways that we never imagined. Just take Mary, when she said yes to having Jesus as her son, she didn’t see the fine print and the cross. But it would come, and she was ready.

3. Guidance.

Since we don’t have God’s cell number and as of now, I haven’t found his FaceBook account, our communication with him is real but very different. His voice isn’t physical, and often we won’t understand all his signs.

So we need someone else who knows him and us well to help. They can look at our situation and help us to make some objective judgments and decisions.

4. Others.

Even though the process of looking, reflecting, judging, and discerning is very personal, we can’t just close in on ourselves. The “I’m not leaving my room until I have it all figured out” will not work!

The plan for your life includes hundreds, maybe even thousands and millions of other people. We belong to the human family and are made to love and be loved. So start now – find a way to help the less fortunate. Often we find what we enjoy, what we were made to do, doing it.

5. Just do it.

In German there is a word, Verpflichtungsangst, which is as scary as it sounds. It means fear to commit. And guys, let be honest, this is all around us. It’s much easier to just enjoy life without getting serious.

Why get married when we can have all the pleasure of sex without the obligation? Why not get drunk when we can have a great time without even really being responsible for our actions? Why make a serious decision and commit to one thing when it eliminates hundreds of other possibilities? Isn’t it better to keep our options open?

At some point, we have to face up to reality, not the reality of FaceBook, where every comment can be deleted, every friend, unfriended, and every status revised.

No we are talking about the reality of life! We have to make a decision, commit to what we thing is best. Once we have seen where we are supposed to go, it’s or no. There won’t be any lightning bolt or vision, but once we have hear that voice in our heart, once we know, we have to respond.

And of course, every door shuts a few others behind us, but it opens toa new world. Every decision carries with it all the consequences and obligations but can bring unimaginable joy and success.

****

Some retired athletes run pubs (nothing wrong with that), but Phil decided to train to become a Catholic priest! He heard God’s call and answered.

See the complete article on Phil Mulryne.

What about you? What are your doubts? What helps you to decide? And I would be happy to share my story if you like. Please send me your comments.

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

It was bright and sunny as I walked into the Square. The columns were like a last grove of trees before walking into the beauty of a hidden meadow. Except this was no hidden meadow, but perhaps the most imposing Church in Christendom.

The water danced in the fountains like diamonds in the sunlight. Everything was almost surreal. As I walked to the door, people all over trying take it in, as much as they could with artistic, cultural, historical overload. Italy does that to people.

They walked around with one earbud in, the other dangling loosely under the chin as the guide rattled off endless names and dates. One hand was on the camera shutter and the other pointing at some distant landmark. But the funniest expression was the face, eyes kind of unfocused but not quited crossed or glazed, the head at a tilt, and the tongue all but lolling out.

Then as I was my way up the steps, through the door, and into St. Peter’s Basilica, I was “wowed” by the splendors and riches of over 500 years of art! Michelangelo, Rafael, Borromini, Cortona, and others – I picked my jaw off the floor.

Amazing, right?! No!

Something went wrong – rewind. The incredible works of art fade from view, and in fact that’s not what really matters! All those statues commemorate men and women that lived and often died for their faith. All the marble expresses the variety, beauty, and complicity of our earthly reality compared with the sublime simplicity and elegance of heaven.

Back out the door by the same people. But that’s not the point either. However amazed they might be, this isn’t a museum. The facade isn’t the exhibit A. St. Peter isn’t a photo shoot. It’s a Church where one encounters the divine.

Finally right where we began at the fountain in the Square. But no, even these we got wrong. Originally there was only one fountain in the middle of the square, and it wasn’t for artistic value. It was practical. PILGRIMS got off their horses, out of their carts, or more likely tugged off mud-caked boots, and washed up.

Over the course of history, Christian pilgrims have gone to countless destinations – Rome, Jerusalem, Spain and the “Camino de Santiago”, Lourdes, and Fatima are just a few!

But what’s the difference between our tourists and pilgrims, sight-seeing and journeying, a landmark and a shrine?

A definition that I found includes four things – (1) a journey, (2) whose motivation should be religious (3) to overcome some hardship and (4) reach a sacred destination.

1. Journey

There something special about going somewhere else. We interrupt our daily routine and undertake a path. Often we don’t know exactly where it leads. We know where we are, where we are going at least nominally, and have some idea of how to get there.

2. Religious motivation

We don’t go on a pilgrimage to take pictures, buy T-Shirts, have new experiences of food, or anything else. We go to forge a new and deeper connection with the supernatural, with someone, with God, with Jesus Christ.

3. Sacrifice

So we don’t live at the time of Chaucer and the Canterbury Tales. Planes, trains, and cars have been invented, and we don’t have to pretend they haven’t. But there’s something about leaving beside our comfort zone. Not only going a new physical place, but reaching a new place in ourselves, one that requires discipline and some loving sacrifice.

4. Sacred destination

Exactly, no pilgrimage to the Baseball Hall of Fame, Elvis and Graceland, or any other such place. Our destination must be linked to the supernatural, linked to God, often because that’s where he burst into space and time.

For us Christians, it is really amazing to see how real our religion is. We don’t sit in the lotus position, meditate on the void – we can go places and see, hear, touch, and taste our faith.

But all of these characteristics just go to show that although we go on pilgrimage, in reality our life IS a pilgrimage. We, humans, are pilgrims by nature.

A pilgrimage evokes the believer’s personal journey in the footsteps of the Redeemer…the pilgrim progresses along the path of Christian perfection, striving to attain, with the support of God’s grace, “the state of the perfect man, to the measure of the full maturity of Christ” (Eph  4:13).
John Paul II, Incarnationis Mysterium, 7

So whether it be going to Rome or just continuing or daily pilgrimage – what are we going to do? Are we on a journey? Do we set out anew each day to new and unseen places? Maybe it just means doing something we don’t normally do – helping less privileged in a shelter, nursing home, or just sharing God with those that don’t know him.

What’s our motivation? Why are we going on that European tour? Or simply why do we get up in the morning? Maybe it is simply making every action a sing of our love for God and neighbor. He doesn’t always call us to exceptional things, but to do them with exceptional love and care.

“Sacrifice”, I know it’s not a popular word. Most of us are not called to make the sacrifice of walking (swimming in most cases) to Rome. Most won’t be called to die like the martyrs on the pilgrimage of life either – crucified, skinned alive, boiled in oil, hung, drawn, and quartered.

But all of us are called to say that encouraging word, offer a smile even when we’re down, to get up those five minutes earlier and say a prayer, or whatever makes the difference.

Finally where are we going? We’re all on a journey to find ultimate happiness and fulfillment – that means God. We’re on our way to heaven, and what step will we take today?

What’s your favorite pilgrimage experience? Please post or send me a note through email, FaceBook, Twitter, or on the page.

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

Kind of a strange topic? Well, I spent two years of graduate philosophy researching it, and I would agree. But to succeed at the project of life, very necessary.

As I was looking for some kind of definition or motivating quote, everything that kept popping up was either Nietzche or Machiavelli and the will-to-power. I decided against the quotes, but I dare to say that willpower for you is probably tainted by these ideas.

My Experience

Until I spent weeks and months researching and writing “The Specificity of the Human Will and its Formation” I was pretty confused without even knowing it.

Don’t worry, this won’t be Philosophy 101, but willpower is important to better understand and live our lives. So first, we need to clear up a couple of things that will power is NOT.

What it’s not

1. Willpower is not proportional to the size of your bicep. 
For some of us, it’s our discipline at the gym, the rigor of our diet, or physical discipline. But just because we work out at the gym every day or because we can lift more than the guy beside us doesn’t mean our will is stronger. Or just because we can’t stop eating gelato doesn’t mean our will is weak (okay, it could be a sign).

2. Willpower is not blind determination or ambition.

For others it’s the hidden drive that leads to success. To succeed at business, studies, life, or even sports, it seems we need that relentless bent to be the best. But your will is not a firehose: a directable flow of energy capable of taking out things in its path depending on how strong it is.

3. Willpower is not a subtle form of masochism.

Others say it must necessarily imply pain. This might sound ridiculous and few would openly admit to being masochists, but are we too far away in practice? The will is not that awful policeman in my life that always blows the whistle right when things are getting good.

4. Willpower is not always doing the opposite of what others do.

Finally our will is not  only the ability to resist peer pressure, be different, swim upstream. If we don’t feel the resistance of the current, something doesn’t always have to be wrong (although it might be). If everybody enjoys something, we don’t have to do the opposite.

Then what is it? 

So if it isn’t any of these, then what? Well, I should probably be more specific before we move on to what it is. It’s not so much that none of these have to do with willpower. In fact, they all do, but they are not willpower in themselves.

We’ve only been considering one side of it. Basically we can say that willpower is our ability to make and follow through with decisions for what is truly good.

Simply put, willpower is Velcro. 

I know it sounds weird, and it does need a little explaining. But it’s true. We need two sides for our decisions to stick. Like everything we’ve talked about until now, we need a certain ability or tenacity in our decisions. But that’s worthless without the other side, our true good.

Our capacity is important – St. Thomas, other saints, and all successful people can attest to that. We have to form habits by repeating our actions and find ways to motivate ourselves.

But, and this is the second side of our Velcro, these if true willpower is going to stick, there has to be a true good. In other words, the concrete decision to be taken must make us a better man.

And here, there’s not an easy answer. Physical well-being is good. Success can be good. Not caving in to peer pressure is good. Even suffering and pain can be a good if it educates and betters us.

True Good

But none of these are an absolute good – they can even be bad when they become our ultimate goal. In other words, yes we need the strength to make and follow through with our choices but those choices have to make us better as people.

Willpower is not just subjective, not just about me. It’s about recognizing what is ultimately, objectively good for me and being able to choose that with tenacity. So what’s good for you?

Copyright 2012 Br. Mark Thelen, L.C.

Editor’s Note: Today, I’m thrilled to welcome Br. Mark Thelen, L.C. to our CatholicMom.com family of contributors. Br. Mark is a Catholic seminarian from Ann Arbor, Michigan studying his third year of Theology in Rome, Italy. God willing, Br. Mark will be ordained a priest in December of 2012. I hope you will join me in praying for our very first seminarian contributor — I know Br. Mark will appreciate our support and will love hearing from you in the comments section below. Be sure to visit his blog CampionProject for a wonderful dose of inspiration and to share it with the young men in your lives who may be listening for their own vocational calling. Welcome Br. Mark! LMH

5 Step New Year’s Resolution Thermometer – How Healthy are They? are We?

Here’s a great quote for New Year’s I came across yesterday:

Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. Mark Twain

A little depressing, but how true. January 1st we make a firm decision, on the 2nd we’re already having second thoughts. On the 3rd, third thoughts, and by the 4th, we’ve forgotten.

So how healthy are they? Are they going to make us happier, better? Or not?

1. When did I come up with them?

A. During Christmas dinner after the third serving of Christmas cake.

B. While surfing the internet on New Year’s Day.

C. While on vacation over the holidays with time to say thanks for all the blessings last year and to see things I need to improve for 2012.

2. What are they about?

A. Following a diet and workout schedule that will finally give me the perfect body – biceps, abs, and all.

B. Getting everyone else around me to change so that I can finally accomplish something this year.

C. Changing my own attitudes and motivations to focus better on what truly matters (God, family, and friends) to find real joy for myself and help others be happier – working toward a perfect soul!

3. Are they positive or negative?

A. They all include the word “not”. There are just so many things that I don’t like about my life that will have to change.

B. None of them include the word not because after reading option A, I realized that I should be more positive. So I rephrased them all.

C. I am convinced that I am called to something new and greater this year. God wants me a better man and closer to him. My resolution is a positive effort to reach that goal.

4. How challenging are they?

A. They can be accomplished within a week because every year is the same – I can’t remember them for more than a week and even if I do it is just long enough for a guilt trip since I haven’t fulfilled them.

B. They are real goals, ones that I won’t finish until I die (and I’ll have to live to 90 at that) because they are the only ones really worth reaching anyway.

C. Realistic goals that will challenge me daily but can help me to make concrete progress this year. I realize that it will take a lifetime to bring the project of my life to completion, but I do this year by year, month by month, day by day.

5. Who or what motivates me?

A. I need to change, and I will hold myself responsible to fulfilling my goals so that I can reach my full potential as me. (Is there any other, I’s, me’s, myself’s, or my’s that I can stick in.)

B. It is all about the others in fact, I don’t think I’ll waste any time on myself.

C. After looking at the challenge ahead, I realize I need to change and grow not only for me but for my family and friends. Ultimately I want to live up to my Creator’s plan for me and bring others to fullness in their lives.

How are your resolutions? If you answered anything other than C above (or still haven’t made any), you might want to look at them. The important thing is not a work of literature or art but a practical tool that will pave… no, not hell, but true joy and heaven for you and those around you.