Teaching Children About Confession

My last RCIC students did their first confessions last Saturday. I had devoted special one on one time with the RCIC students. This was in addition to the 2 class times my co-teacher and I had spent on the Sacrament of Confession. Why so much time on Confession ? Well, get comfortable and I’ll explain to you, as I did to my students why this is one of the most important Sacraments of all.

I found that the private one on one time with each student before their First Reconciliation was the most informative to them. We went over the material from class again then I gave them an Examination of Conscience sheet that I had found. It was written for all age groups and went into great detail of the 10 Commandments and Confession. As I went through each of the examples of the Commandments with very specific questions of examining your conscience before Confession, I felt young again myself. Yes, it was a little embarrassing at first, seeing some of my own omissions of sin and things that I should have confessed, but I had never seen it broken down into such perfect questions.

We scheduled a couple of students each week to do their Confessions spread out over a longer period of time due to the large class size. I had asked them to document the things they needed to confess and bring it with them as I had learned from experience, nerves can make you draw a completely blank mind once you are in the confessional. When we went through the new sheets and questions of your conscience, I was stopped immediately by the first student and asked if I had a pen or pencil, they had things to add to their confession. This happened with each student as we went through the complete examination of your deeds of your life and last weeks. I got so used to this, I would have the pen handy for when they asked for it, as they all did. I have no doubts that these children confessed everything they had done that could be considered a violation of the 10 Commandments. One asked me for another sheet of paper.

From the very beginning of class I had told the students that I would be nothing less than honest with them. However, in our one on one’s, I would tell them things I had confessed, things I always need to confess and work on in my own life. They were surprised that their teacher had things to confess. One told me that she thought that I was perfect since I taught Confession so well. I told her that the reason I taught the Sacrament of Confession so well was because like everyone I am a sinner but I do not hide my sins. I want them gone, so I confess them to get absolution and have my soul purified as much as possible. I don’t want these bad things on my mind and conscience, so telling them to Father, getting my penance, doing it with happy heart, and trying harder the next week was the best way to get Grace from God. I also told her that tno human that is perfect, we all have faults and sins.

Since this was their first Reconciliation and we are a rather large parish, they did a face to face confession. I would walk them in, introduce them to our priest and have them shake hands, and I would turn and leave. I would then go talk to the next student alone to make sure they were prepared as one I had just lead to their first confession.

I would then assist them with their penance because they had been so elated coming out from confession, they couldn’t remember much else other than they were made clean again in God’s eyes. I have no idea what our priest said t them in there that made them all but float out with joyful faces and I have no right to ask. Whatever he said to them in that confessional was the perfect thing to say. None came out shamefaced or with a blush of shame staining their cheeks. They were happy, elated and full of joy. I had never seen this before as this was my first year teaching RCIC. My heart still aches with the memory and my eyes well up with tears.

We would kneel and I would help them with their penance as they forgot the words for their Our Father’s or Hail Mary’s. It was like aiding my own children. We had forged a bond before their first confession and it was unbreakable when they came out and asked for assistance with their penance. Sharing my own sins with them was the Super Glue that let them know that not even their teacher was perfect and had things in her own life to confess and work on to be a better person.

The one sin I have to confess each time is the trouble I have in letting God control my life completely and not to worry about things. That He is in charge and up all night. We are supposed to ‘Be still and know that I am God’ from Psalm 46. I told my students that this was the hardest thing for me, daily to not try to second guess God’s decisions for me and my life and that I struggle all the time with trying to do it my way instead. My students were shocked at my admission of this.

The boy I sponsored who I am proud to claim as my Godson now, asked “Why is that so hard for you? I can do it.” I replied “If you ask most adults and they are honest about it, they are just like me, and this should be something they confess as well if they really examine their lives that they are not letting go and letting God take control.” I also told him “God, Jesus and Mary all love children the best because your faith in them is complete and pure. It is easy for you to trust completely as you are a child and we are told as adults we are to be like children in our Faith. You are so lucky, far better in your pure Love and Belief than adults and even me. Do not ever lose your complete and pure Love and Belief that God will take care you.”

So in closing this column, I am asking you to do what I asked my students to do. Examine your conscience completely by the tenets of the 10 Commandments and ask yourself if you are being still and knowing that He is God.

Pax,
Lori Callaway

p.s. The following is the link in which I found the Examination of Conscience before Confession. It from a site called Keeping It Catholic. It was after going through this examination all of my students had things to add to their confession. It may help you as it did me and my class. God Bless. http://catholic_homeschool.tripod.com/exam.html

Lori Callaway is married to her best friend Scott and mother of 3 children, all of whom are her inspiration and fodder for her freelance writing. Her hobbies are knitting (as a lefty), rosary making, sewing, cross stitching, crafts and ¾ to full time genealogist and history nut. She currently lives in one of the giant metro areas the Pacific Northwest of the US after having grown up in American’s idea of a perfect mid-western small town. Lori is also an RCIC teacher.