Husbands as Spiritual Leaders of the Family by Dawn Corliss-Ingoglia

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In my current faith journey, I have recently being tuning in to various shows on a catholic television station. These shows have had some wonderful points of consideration for me as I have been reflecting on some of the same topics myself. After reflection, I have realized that we, husbands and wives each have a special role. It’s all part of God’s plan for us.

As I grown in my faith I see how my relationships are positively reflected. especially in my marriage. I’ve mentioned before that my husband is not a practicing Catholic, yet I pray that one day he will be open to developing a relationship with God. Over the years, I have been the person who winds up handle everything, or voice my opinion when it was welcomed or not. I always seem to know the right way everything should be done.

I’m now trying to be more supportive of my husband and allow him to be the head of our home. It’s not an easy task for anyone I think who has lived so long in the world, but does take some exercise. I can remember a time when people would refer to Ephesians 5:22-33; where it details the roles of a married couple. “A wife should obey her husband and the husband should care and love his wife, as Jesus loved his church.” Ignorantly, I would reason that my husband doesn’t love me as Jesus loved the church so I don’t have to obey him. (Gotta love the lies we believe sometimes).

However, I do realize that if I want my husband to be the head of our home, maybe I can help him along by being more supportive of him and focusing on my duties as a Christian wife. Maybe he will then respond by taking on his one day with God’s help. Doug Barry, co-host “Life on the Rock,” was detailing how a priest helped him to discover his role as the 1st line of defense for his family spiritually. I was amazed at this notion I had never thought of my husband in this sense. But, it’s so true; he is our protector. When my youngest doesn’t like my discipline (typically a stern ‘No’) he runs to daddy to protect him from mommy. When we recently had an earthquake, I was calling out for my husband. As humans, we already have these roles identified for us subconsciously.

So really why would it be any different spiritually? Now when I pray for the protection of my family, I wonder how much stronger the prayers would be if they came from my husband, or from us as a couple. I’ve shared the notion of spiritual leader with my husband as well as his role in helping shape our boys spiritual future. He seems to be more open to the possible of one day being more active in church. This past weekend I was telling my husband how our oldest son, who is 9, doesn’t kneel erectly, slouches around, or wants to have a conversation. This really bugs me, I find it very disrespectful. He then asked my son if he needed to go to church with us so that in order to have my son behave more appropriately. I couldn’t believe my ears, and I felt my heart skip for joy.

My husband might not be exactly where I wish he was at spiritual but he is listening to my concerns, and hopefully a seed will flourish in the future if God wills it.

Copyright 2010 Dawn Corliss-Ingoglia

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About Author

Lisa M. Hendey is the founder and editor of CatholicMom.com and the bestselling author of the Chime Travelers children's fiction series, The Grace of Yes, The Handbook for Catholic Moms and A Book of Saints for Catholic Moms. As a board member and frequent host on KNXT Catholic Television, Lisa has produced and hosted multiple programs and has appeared on EWTN and CatholicTV. Hendey hosted “Catholic Moments” on Radio Maria and is the technology contributor for EWTN’s SonRise Morning Show. Lisa's articles have appeared in Catholic Digest, National Catholic Register, and Our Sunday Visitor. Hendey travels internationally giving workshops on faith, family, and Catholic technology and communications topics. She was selected as an Elizabeth Egan Journalism Fellow, attended the Vatican Bloggers Meeting, the “Bishops and Bloggers” meeting and has written internationally on the work of Catholic Relief Services and Unbound. Hendey lives with her family in the Archdiocese of Los Angeles. Visit Lisa at www.LisaHendey.com for information on her speaking schedule or to invite her to visit your group, parish or organization.

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