This beautiful photo is courtesy of Suzanne Mellott Photography
As I sat before Jesus, in His Most Blessed Sacrament, at Eucharistic Adoration this week…I was resting in His perfect peace.
I was the only one in the whole Church at that hour. Usually, some of my children are with me, but on this particular day, I had gone all alone.
While I sat gazing at and loving Our Lord, I was compelled to look all around the Church.
“This is Your Life”, I thought…all of the images and statues and paintings and windows seemed to me to be like a Family Photo Album of the Life of Christ…On my left and my right, the beautiful Stations of the Cross; telling the story of His Passion and Death, the day He gave His all, for me.
In front and to my right are the lovely tiered votive candles set before a pretty painting of Our Lady and Her Infant,Divine, Son. There are about 24 candles all-told, and of those, about 6 of them had been lit by those who had come to pray earlier in the day…the lights still glimmering and flames still burning, as if to keep their prayers present before Him.
I see the faces of His dearest friends…Peter, Paul, and James. I see His cousin, Jude, Thaddeus, and His loving and devoted father on earth, Joseph. I see His mother, always close by Him…and the magnificent stained glass windows, so colorful, clear, and pouring with the sunlight from outside.
There are flowers at His altar…some are poinsettias, left over from His Christmas celebration…and others, I recognize right away as the flowers that were next to the tiny coffin of my friend’s little baby girl; whose funeral we attended just the other day.
“This is Your Life, Jesus”, I thought…and it is perfect. It is beautiful…it is allllll good.
Everything thing that represents a moment or scene from the days He walked this earth evokes feelings of such peace, such joy, such love, and such beauty.
I felt so happy. I felt so grateful. I felt so in-awe.
But then, suddenly, another feeling gripped my heart…it was that of sorrow…it was that of contrition…it was that of shame
“What would my life look like if constructed with statues and windows and images in this Church?”, I wondered.
“Nothing like this, I’m afraid”, I answered myself.
My windows would be grimy and clogged with old dirt, so cloudy, perhaps, that the inside of the Church would remain in darkness because the light would not get through. My statues would be chipped and broken; some even missing limbs, perhaps. My Stations would not show one who was giving all for love of another…but rather, one, who continued to fall under the weight of selfishness and pride. My flowers would be wilted; some, even dead. And, my paintings would be marred and smeared.
“Oh, Lord”, I said to Jesus. “If this were My Life, it would be so ugly…for my life gets its beauty only from Yours”.
I began to feel very, very sad.
But then, I could feel His presence…so tangibly, so pure, so loving, so kind, so caring, so merciful, and true.
He spoke to my heart, and He said, “No, Judy. You are wrong. Your life would not be ugly because this is your life! Don’t you see? I gave up my own life so that you can have life and have it abundantly!!! I abide in you and you in Me…therefore, all that you see here…that you are saying is a glimpse of My life….is your life too…you are forgiven…you are free…your life looks as beautiful and clean and peaceful and perfect as Mine.”
I cried. I smiled. I sighed in relief….and I thanked Him for His wondrous gift.
Copyright 2011 Judy Dudich