Compensation for Moms

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What if moms were compensated by the government to stay at home with their children from birth until they graduate from high school? How different would our future generation look? If you were to interview criminals how often would you find that their background contributed almost 100% to their crimes? How many drug addicts and alcoholics are trying to get away from the pain of the past? How many teen pregnancies have occurred between 3 pm when school dismissed and 6pm when their parents get home? How many people who are homeless can trace so much back to their upbringing? How many times have you heard “my mom had to work 2 jobs to put us through school so she wasn’t there for me”? How many studies show that teens and young adults in gangs are there because they want a family, the family they never had at home?

What would life look like if instead of throwing the people in jail that are trying to escape their past through drugs, alcohol, and gang related crimes, we found the root of the problem? What if we dug to the deepest depth of why these crimes occur instead of trying to put a band aid on the cut what if we got rid of what caused the cut in the next generation?

There was a time before the 1960’s when less gangs, drug addicts and teen pregnancies. Was it correlated to a mom being home? Did it have something to do with the fact that the children and teens knew that moms were home in all the neighborhoods and they watched what was happening and intervened? There was a time when moms did not have to work and their first priority was their family, their husband, children and home life. There was less divorce. There was less stress on the family. There was a person who had a role in life that held the family together, that raised the children that helped with homework that was an advocate of her children’s education that worked on her marriage that did it all. Was it overwhelming, of course it was? Were the women ready to be liberated and find their own independence of course they were. Is there a way to find a happy median between those two worlds?

I propose that there is. What if the moms who want to stay home with their children and are not seeking to be career women were compensated for their role as a mom? What would happen if even the career moms would only have to work part time because they are compensated for being a mom? What would happen if the compensation was given to those who want to stay at home, raise their children, and get involved with their child’s education, sports and activities? What would happen if we raised our children within a stable atmosphere where they knew that someone was always there for them? A place where they were completely loved and bonded with a parent? What if that child came first in that mom’s life because she didn’t have to worry about holding down a job so the lights would stay on in the house and that the mortgage would be paid? What would happen if that child had time to spend with that mom to learn manners, respect, work ethic and how relationships work? What if that mom had the time to take care of the house, laundry, cooking, cleaning, school commitments etc. so the stress of catching up rarely occurred? What would our future generation look like if moms were home to give that child a hug, sit down at the table and do homework together? Studies have proved that regardless of the institute or level of education if a parent is not involved with the child’s education it is rare for the child to succeed. It’s difficult to be involved when we are at work, running errands, fighting with our spouses because we are overstressed by all the demands of life as a two parent working family is..

If the government could see how much compensating a mom would change the face of our society I think they would invest. Not compensating with $50,000/yr maybe $20,000 like a part time job. How much does it take to keep one criminal alive in prison for 1 year? I found stats between $30 – $40. It would be an investment that would save so much money for the government. Would we still have crimes, drug addicts, gangs, murder, and prostitution? Of course we would have crime but it would decrease dramatically if as children these people had a sense of stability, security, purpose, confidence and love in their lives, guaranteed!!

Is there really a more important job in life than raising a child to be a responsible and caring adult that contributes to society? What job holds more importance than how we form the future generation? Everyone thinks the key is education and that is a huge piece but the bigger piece is the foundation that surrounds and encompasses the life of a child/teen/young adult and that can only come through a loving, stable family. Don’t we want our family life back? Without time to build it, nurture it and grow it, this will never happen and the unrest will continue. We can’t go back to the 1950’s, we have learned too much and we women need our rights and independence but we can learn from the neglect of the family (not solely due to the “working mom”, but to the breakdown of the family as a unit). What needs to change, what’s going to break if we don’t change?

Compensate the moms that want to be full time moms and watch a good percentage of our future transform for the better. Give that opportunity to more moms and you will find more stay at home moms that will change our world for the best.

Copyright 2011 Lori Hadorn-Disselkamp

 

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About Author

Lori Hadorn-Disselkamp is first and foremost a mother of four children under the age of 17. She has been married to the love of her life, Aaron, for over 19 years. Lori has been writing at her own website Faith Filled Mom for over 6 years. She writes about the journey of faith we live daily and how we can recognize God in this world. She has completed her 3rd year of teaching theology at a high school level and is also a current student of Loyola University Extension Program of Ministry earning a Master’s Degree in Religious Education. Her life is busy, exciting, overwhelming at times but always bursting with her faith in God. Lori hopes that you will find something that might touch your heart in her writing so that she can continue to pursue her purpose in life; to bring people closer to God one word, one moment at a time.

1 Comment

  1. As a stay at home mom, I applaud your citing the positives of a parent staying at home. However, I am horrified at the proposition that the government should pay us to stay home. Where would this magical money from the government come from? Maybe raising taxes on the already overburdened working families? Should single mothers be forced through taxes to pay for other mothers to stay at home with their children?

    A better proposal would be tax credits given for one parent not working to lessen the tax burden maybe allowing a family to get closer to having one parent stay home. Lessening the tax burden on families would have a much better societal impact, than working families paying the bill for stay at home moms.

    A great goal, but government involvement in who stays home is not an answer.

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