World Marriage Day -- Why I Love My Spouse

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Why-I-Love-My-Husband

World Marriage Day — Why I Love My Spouse

Holy Mother Church celebrates World Marriage Day each year on the second Sunday in February. Worldwide Marriage Encounter, which sponsors the day, offers many ideas for churches, groups, and couples. As we gear up to celebrate World Marriage Day this coming Sunday, I thought it might be nice to issue a simple challenge to us married folks. Are you up for it? Well keep reading to learn more!

A well-known research study from Dr. John Gottman at the University of Washington found it takes at least five positive interactions to make up for just one negative interaction. In other words, a negative ‘tude is five times more powerful than a positive one. Talk about negative bias at work!

Think about it, though. How often do we dwell on negative comments, stories, and events? I do all too often, more than I care to admit, but I’m not alone. Psychology tells us that we are wired to do so, that the brain tends to remember negative things more strongly and in more detail. How’s that for a good reminder of the necessity of actively engaging in more acts of kindness with one another?

This is why I love a blog series called “Why I Love My Husband” hosted at the blog More Like Mary – More Like Me. Kaitlin Alfermann, the feminine genius behind the blog, explains:

I started a series called “Why I Love My Husband” on my own blog and was so encouraged by the number of women who wanted to follow suit.

I’m so saddened when women complain about their husbands. It’s one thing to have an actual problem in your marriage and seek the advice, counsel, and support of a good friend. It’s another thing completely to trash the man you chose to marry and spend the rest of your life with. It’s not acceptable. We need to be building up our husbands with everything we have within us, not cutting them down with hurtful comments to other women. Yes, they have faults. But we don’t need to expose those faults to others. We don’t need to go on and on about them.

If you’d like to reject a culture that says it’s acceptable to tear down your husband, join me with this blog series!

So over-the-top enthusiastic about Kaitlin’s idea, I immediately joined the “Why I Love My Husband” blogging parade and now run a similar series at my personal blog. And oh how it warms my heart to see Joel’s face light up when he reads the blogposts dedicated to him.

So are you up for this challenge? Will you join me? Here it is:

Compliment your spouse liberally. It makes him/her a better person.

Now you don’t need to run a blog in order to join the challenge. In fact, it’s far better to share these compliments with our spouses in the flesh — face-to-face and maybe even while holding hands!

Discussion starter: Why do you love your spouse? How do you show love for him or her? Please chime in below; I’m looking forward to learning from you!

For more great ideas on becoming a holy wife or husband, check out these great Holy Husband and Holy Wife prayer cards from our friends at Aquinas & More.

Ten Rules for a Happy and Successful Husband

Ten Rules for a Happy and Successful Wife

Image Credit

Copyright 2013 Lisa Schmidt

 

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About Author

Lisa Schmidt writes at ThePracticingCatholic.com with her husband Joel. A proud Iowan, the Schmidts reside in Des Moines where Lisa is a full-time at-home mom. She also supports her husband in his deacon ministries for the Diocese of Des Moines. At The Practicing Catholic, Lisa enjoys writing about the things that bring her great joy: the Catholic faith, her family, fine arts, and good food.

3 Comments

  1. I love this idea. Not all because, as a guy I like compliments but also because, on the flip side I like giving my wife compliments. I see far too many men and women complaining about their spouse to other people. It truly makes you wonder why they are married to the person to begin with, especially if the only time you hear about him/her is when they are complaining about them. If your job as a husband or wife is help your spouse to get to heaven how are you doing that by dragging them through the mud?

    I think that taking a moment each day to remember what it is that you love about that person, and think about how you told them about those things that day is a great idea. Taking the time to write those things down is really very cool. Think of the “love notes” you sent when you were a kid.

    I have a small counter proposal. Everyday for the month of February (surely you can come up with 28) write one reason why you love your spouse on a post-it note (so keep it short,) and then put the notes somewhere they will find them. A computer monitor, the fridge, the bathroom mirror… The more personal and less general the better.

  2. Jennifer Sagel on

    I think this is great! We must admit to ourselves that seeking advice and counsel is very different from “venting” and complaining. I find that when I focus on the little annoyances of my husband, then that’s all I can seem to see in him. But when I make it a point to see his generous actions, then that’s what I notice more of. I also think that we have a responsibility to help steer conversation in a positive direction when we find ourselves having negative “water cooler” talk about our husbands.

  3. My husband and I resolved to not fight/argue this year. And so far, we have done it! It is very pleasant in our house. I like Jeff’s idea, a note a day. BTW Lisa, my husband is also, God willing, going to be ordained a deacon in 2014.

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